Possession
by klarita1
Summary: (editing) The story begins when Darcy decide to write a letter to her, instead of making his second proposal. Letters,conversations and meetings take place, only to find themselves falling under a passionate spell with no limits. Meeting of minds, genuine passion and l ove.
1. The letter

_**The letter**_

What if Darcy instead of his second proposal, he wrote her a letter?

_ My dearest,  
You may be surprised by my warm greeting or maybe even of this letter, but I beg you do not be offended. I cannot longer live with the anxiety whether I have a chance of succeeding. I cannot longer dream of you and not have you, nor can I stand the thought of you, alive in the world thinking ill of me.____I shall never forget our odd progress towards one another, never have I found such a consideration in my entire being._The reason of writing you this letter is simply that: I cannot bare to see you again, knowing that you are are thinking of the fact, if you are mine.  
I am aware that the things I have done affected you and I can understand why. You have every reason in the world to be angry at me, or even think ill of me. I may seem weak in your eyes, but I am not. My love for you is not weak , on the contrary, it is so powerful that consumes me. All of me. You have all of me, my heart and soul. I have not loved, or ever will love so deep anyone, as I love you. For you I only think and plan. Have you not seen this? Dearest, loveliest Elizabeth,you pierce my soul.  
I had a dream last night. We were together, in our home, here in Pemberley. We were in the library and you were reading a book. I was staring at you and when you finally realized it, you smiled. You put the book away and you approached me. My heart almost stopped. You came and sat next to me . You touched my face with your lovely hands and you kissed me. Oh how long I have been dreaming of your kisses. I woke up suddenly, like it was a nightmare. But it wasn't. It was the most beautiful dream I had in my entire existence. I have dreamt many times your face and your voice is echoing constantly in my ears.___I cannot let you burn me up, nor can I resist you. No mere human can stand in a fire and not be consumed._  
My love for you, is stronger by far than the love of those who are older or wiser than me. And neither the angels in heaven, nor the demons, can ever dissever my soul from yous. Because you see, my darling, my beautiful bride, my heart belongs to you. My whole being belongs to you. Some say that we are masters of the unsaid words, but slaves of those we let slip out. But instead, I find myself your slave and you, dearest, you are my  
only master.  
A few days ago, I thought I loved you, but since I last saw you, I feel I love you thousand times more. There are some duties and responsibilities that I have to do and work is one of them, Georgiana is also one of them and caring for myself is one of them. I can hardly work anymore, and when I do I think only of you. Georgiana says that I neglect her, it was the first time of her sixteen years she said such a thing to me. As for me,  
to love you alone, to make you happy, to do nothing which would contradict your wishes, this is my destiny and the meaning of my life.  
Even when I am in bed my thoughts rush to you, my love, now and then cheerfully and then sadly. I have waited too much for the fate to hear my prayers and answer me, whether I must face the life with or without you. But, Elizabeth, you are the only, who can give me an answer, because faith and hope have abandoned me while ago. You see, I said to my soul, be still and wait without hope, for hope would be hope for the wrong thing; there is yet faith, but the faith and the love and the hope are all in the waiting.  
May I request you to drop me a line, or a look, or a smile, to inform me when I may wait upon you? For pity's sake do; and let me have it soon. I am all agony, can you not feel it? Only come to me, come even if you do not want to, even if you do not love me. Come and let me prove you for the rest of our lives how I adore you. And maybe in the future, you will smile back to me with that beautiful smile of yours that pierce my soul, and then I will  
know. I will know that you are truly mine.  
If all I have said and done, and I am about to say and do, have not sufficiently proved what my feelings are towards you, I have no other proof to offer. I have already gave you my heart, and it is there in your hands, waiting either to beat again or to be crushed.  
I shall ever remain,  
your affectionate admirer and servant,  
Fitzwilliam Darcy

As she finished reading it, Elizabeth cried. Cried until she fell asleep. She knew, she knew that he was meant for her. He was right, she truly belonged to him.

* * *

I have been reading lately love letters by great men. And I thought that since Darcy is one of them -even though he is fictional- he must have at least written a letter confessing his undying love.  
Please tell me if you like it, love it or hate it. I really wish for you opinion. Did it make you shiver or it was awful? Please review!


	2. A step even closer

**A step even closer**  
_Being deeply loved someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage_

It was almost dawn, when she woke up and she immediately sat on the desk. She had ripped many papers, until she finally finished the letter. She had troubled herself too much, on how she should address him, or what to say. But the most difficult thing of all was the dilemma she had, if she should return his feelings or not. But deep in her heart she knew, that it was not going to take too much time to give in.

_Dear Mr. Darcy_  
_I can truly say that I am amazed sir, not from your affections, because feeling love is one of the true miracles that life can give you, but from you, from your confession. I never thought that I man like you, could ever acknowledge or even confess in that beautiful way such a passion to a mere woman._  
_I speak to you, as I would speak to any person, who possesses my true thoughts, for my true thoughts have spend more time with you than anyone else these past few weeks. I have been thinking about you, about you and me and how badly I had misjudged you. I truly, dear sir, regret the awful things I said to you, because they were not precise and I wish and hope that you can forgive me, for I could not bare the thought of you thinking ill of me. Please say that you are willing and can forgive me._  
_There is another matter that since I've known it, I have been most anxious to tell you how thankful I am. Thank you for your kindness you showed to my poor sisters, as I thank you as for all the things you've done to make me see. See of my true self, for I had been too weak not to realize how wrong I can be. But is you, and you alone, who brought me back and I would be too harsh not to praise you thus._  
_Maybe I should regret my appearance in your home, but I do not, not even in the most sensible corner of my heart. Because you see, my dearest sir, I now know the unsaid truth. How forgiving, gentle and kind a heart can be._  
_I would wish to see you again, just to see your eyes, when you would answer me if I am truly forgiven or it was just the love you feel for me that have put your bitterness away. But I am well aware that such a thing is not possible to happen, for I could not forgive myself If in any way I would cause you trouble. Your aunt was here, claiming your engagement. But that was not the thing that pained me. The things she said to me made me sad, because I know that they are true._  
_However, you can write to me, whenever you feel the need to. I would always be here to reply you. And do not be afraid, all those things you said to me, did not offend me in any way._  
_Yours,_  
_Elizabeth Bennet_

The letter reached Pemberley three days later. It was a great pleasure to Darcy, when he finally got it. He was afraid that she wasn't going to reply at all. His whole life depended upon her. Georgiana, who enjoyed that day his cheerful company and bright smiles, asked for the reason of his high spirits and Darcy, who could not longer keep to himself such a happiness revealed her the true reason. That he had finally got her reply.

"That is wonderful indeed Fitzwilliam" she replied as she touched his hand "She is not so cold to you, as you though she was."

"That is true" he said with a severe voice "but, nevertheless I haven't read the letter yet. So be patient, dear sister"  
"I know that it will be promising." she laughed.

"I hope so." he paused. "Do you think that she is a good match for me?"

Georgiana with honesty, she replied "I couldn't imagine anyone, who could have tamed you better" He laughed. "But tell me, brother, why did fell in love with her in the first place?"  
"Ohh" he was surprised. "Certainly, it wasn't her appearance. I even remember calling her tolerable. I believe it was her brain that attracted me."

"Then, I believe my dearest, that she is your soulmate" she laughed.

"I will visit Netherfield." she said with his severe voice.

* * *

What do you say? Do you like it at all? Please review to give me strength to continue, or maybe I will stop. Review!  
I promise a longer chapter next time. I only wanted to update soon that's why it is so small, because some of you were really anxious about her response. I did disappoint you a little bit I think, but do not be afraid. Elizabeth is going to give in...

**Next: A single soul in two bodies**


	3. An unexpected arrival

**Chapter three: An unexpected arrival**

_Promising things happen, when you least expecting them._

It was a usual afternoon and Elizabeth with Jane were invited in Netherfield. Since jane's courtship to Bingley, the two sisters spend most of their time near the big estate. But unfortunately for Elizabeth, she had to put up Miss Bingley, who seemed to pay attention to her all the time. They did not fancy each other, that was obvious, but nevertheless, they kept civility between them. That afternoon,which seemed a ordinary proved the opposite.

It was after dinner and the party was seated in the drawing room, when they heard of a carriage. Bingley, as the master of the house, excused himself. When he returned, he was not alone. A tall man was with him.

Elizabeth was playing the piano and as for Jane and Miss Bingley, were talking of the upcoming wedding. None of them, really saw Darcy came in. On the other hand, the gentleman immediately as he walked in found himself observing Elizabeth, who looked remarkably well. She had that usual light upon her and her eyes, were captivating as always. Bingley announced his friend and everyone looked at him. Darcy hadn't felt such a distress in his entire life. He was afraid, indeed he was. He was afraid of talking to her.

Immediately the ladies stood up and formed a smile, when he finally sat down on the couch near Bingley, Elizabeth could finally breathe. Her hands were trembling and she was certain that she had formed a blush. It was her thoughts that made her blush, thoughts of him. However anxious she may were, she never stopped her performance. She could feel his look upon her and that was the time when they finally looked each other.

He smiled first; as she was too embarrassed even to breathe. He had that beautiful smile, which could make everyone forget to breathe. Elizabeth's heart almost stopped. He really was here. In the same room, breathing the same air as she. Could that be all true? But what about her letter, did he not receive it? She could clearly remember telling him that in spite of her great wish to see him, that could not happen. Why did he want to make things more complicated than they already were?

When she finally finished her performance, she stood up and sat next to Jane, who was still talking with Miss Bingley, while her brother occupied his friend. When the gentlemen stopped, they approached the ladies and sat next to them.

"I must tell you Miss Elizabeth, your performance was perfect this time" Bingley said all kindness.

"I thank you, Mr. Bingley, but I hardly think that is true.," she smiled

"What do you think, eh Darcy?"

"Yes, I think so too." He paused "Are you well Miss Elizabeth?"

She looked at him "Very well thank you. " she looked again down. "Is your sister well? Why did all her friends left her?"

"She is very well. Yes, indeed, but nevertheless she stayed in London"

she smiled "We had the most interesting conversations, I really did enjoyed her company"

"You can visit her any time, you wish" he smiled at her and she blushed.

"Did you finish the book, Miss Elizabeth?" Miss Bingley asked, only to take part in the conversation. It is usual of course, she loved to be the centre of attention, but that was not the only reason she spoke. Darcy was here and she couldn't let a young lady like Elizabeth attract him more, than she had already did. She was meant to be with him, afterall. She didnt feel jealous, she felt that she had to make the right thing, marrying him was even consented by God himself.

"Yes, I did and I dare say that I found it extremely interesting. Have you read it?"

"Yes, but I did not like it as you did. I never really understood his character" she replied.

"What book, Elizabeth?" Her sister asked, before Darcy had the chance to.

"Coelebs in search of a wife by Hannah More" she paused. "Have you read it, Mr. Darcy? I know that you are quite fond of reading"

"Yes, indeed I have. But I really think that the author gives a very bad nation of men" he paused. "But, nevertheless it gives a interesting view of love and marriage."

"I believe so too. But I suppose love has nothing to do with marriage and its obligation." She said raising an eyebrow, challenging him. Ohh, how he loved when she did that. He really wished that moment to grab her and hold her tight, never letting her go. But, that was not thoughts that gentleman was supposed to do, when he looked at women. "A person, I believe must first fall in love and then marry someone, if we want those people to truly be matched."

He smiled, a little. "Do you believe that a marriage, unequal in love has a chance of succeeding?"

"I do not think that I understand you"

"If, for instance, the gentleman proposes to a woman, who has no feeling for him at all, accepts his hand, do you think the marriage will fail from the beginning?" Her heart almost stopped. He wasn't talking in general, he was talking about them.

"Maybe, but maybe not. It depends on the woman." She laughed "and how much she can endure"

"But, Miss Elizabeth, are not the ladies, who are supposed to be enduring?" Miss Bingley joined.

"No, I do not think that it's on our character. Men, as well, can be enduring. I think it depends on the person." She paused to think. "Take for instance, my sister and me, she is very patient and always endures whatever she has to do, when it is not in her linking" she looked at her sister and smiled "On the other hand, I hardly do what is expecting and I can endure whatever I think it is right."

"Then," she laughed "you will not find easily your match" Elizabeth gave her a cold smile and then turned her eyes into her lap.

"I think you are mistaken, Lizzy" her sister broke the awkward silence "you endure mama's talkativeness"

They all laughed and for the last time of that evening, Elizabeth looked Darcy on the eyes. How she had missed those eyes. When it was about for the Bennet sisters departure, the gentlemen helped the ladies into the carriage and asked them if they could call on them. But, to their unfortunate luck, they denied, claiming that they had some other fixed engagements, which was true.

"I see the way you look at her" Bingley said as they saw the carriage moving away

"What do you mean, Charles?" Darcy asked with his severe voice.

"You know what I mean, old friend. Elizabeth, I am talking about Elizabeth"

"Do not be ridiculous, Charles." He said and laughed ironically "I am only being civil to her"

"But for a reason. You cannot fool me, you look at her in the same way I look at Jane."

"No, I am not. It's only your scandalous imagination" he replied coldly

"Maybe, but I would be really glad if you and I would be brothers" he said and touched his back.

* * *

Two days later, Mr. Bingley as usual visited Longburn, but to Elizabeth's astonishment Darcy didn't come with him. Mr. Bingley claimed that he didnt had returned from his morning walk. Jane and he took a small walk outside the house and when she finally returned, announced to her sister that they were expecting in Netherfield for lunch. Elizabeth immediately refused, but her sister changed her mind. The truth was that she longed to see him, but her mind was telling her that she should not. He was engaged, soon to be married.

When Elizabeth got home, hours later, she found that Jane had already gone to Netherfield with the carriage. Obviously, she was late and her sister could not wait her any longer. She found a note from her, saying that she should come as she promised. She asked for her mother if she could take the other carriage, but she most emphatically refused, saying that it maybe be needed. The only choice she had was to walk, for she did not ride, but that was not a trouble, she had done it before...

* * *

I have to admit that this was not the long chapter, I've promise to. But, I _wanted to see how many of you really like this and following me what you think, tell me if you really like it and if it deserves to be continued. Because I think that I should stop it_. I am sorry that this chapter did not have a letter, but I think it didnt fit. But I promise that in the next or two after this chapter, there is going to be one. I'm preparing it.

**What are you going to see next: **_Elizabeth being distant, a note and a meeting._


	4. Every step you take

**Chapter four: "Every step you take, I'll be watching you"**

_"Every breath you take, every move you make, every bond you break, every step you take, I'll be watching you. -The Police"_

"Where is your sister, Miss Bennet?" Caroline asked as she walked towards the couch.

"She was out for her usual walk" she paused "but, she promised to come. And she will"

Bingley smiled. "I am sure."

"Does she walk often?" Darcy asked

"Almost everyday. I think that it helps her think" Jane confessed

"I still remember her, coming here on foot." Miss Bingley laughed "She is a great walker, indeed"

"Yes, she is" Jane replied with civility.

"She has many virtues" Bingley said "Don't you think Darcy?"

"I suppose." he answered with his severe voice, acting indifferently.

"I am sure you agree with me" he paused just to look outside the window. "Should I order a carriage for your sister? It is raining, rather heavily I must say."

"I hope that she didn't decide to come here on foot again" Jane replied worried "Poor Lizzy"

As the rest of them were talking, Darcy stood next to the window and praised that she hadn't decide to extent her walk. She was going to be his death, that was sure. His heart was beating so quickly that he couldn't control it, he never felt more worried in his life. He looked one more time outside, when he saw a tiny object moving towards the house. But it was going too slow and the heavy rain, didnt help Darcy at all to figure it out. As the object was getting closer and closer, Darcy gathered all his senses on that thing.

Actually, it was not a thing. She was Elizabeth. He kept staring outside at her, almost in shock. She really was here, walking in the rain. Darcy called over Bingley to see her as well, but when he finally made it to the window, she was gone. There was nothing there, only the fog and rain. No, he couldn't have dreamt her. Elizabeth was walking, he was certain. But before Bingley could say anything else, he yelled for a footman and asked to prepare his horse. Bingley yelled from behind, to prevent him for going outside in that terrible weather, but Darcy was already gone.

* * *

"Are you alright?" Darcy asked as he got off his horse. But Elizabeth could hardly breathe. She was almost out of breathe, she was sitting in the fields in an unladylike way. She was crying. "Do not cry" he said and took her hand in his.

"I..my..."

"Elizabeth, please I beg you." He paused "Are you hurt?"

"My leg" she paused as she tried to calm herself "I tripped and..."

"Do you think you can make it?" He asked and lifted her up, so she could stand, but immediately she fell. Almost. Darcy didnt let her. He kept her close to him with his arms.

"I cannot walk"

Immediately, he lifted her up in his arms. He could barely feel his legs and she was the reason. He had many dreams of her, how it could feel to hold her tight, but none of them really felt that good as reality. She was so tempting, there in his arms, holding her tight, touching her body. All he had to do now, was to kiss her. There were only few inches apart, but no. No, he wanted to make it perfect. He wanted their first kiss to be perfect.

As he walked towards the house, with her in his arm he could feel her heartbeat. It was too fast. He had to calm her down "You are going to be fine" he whispered. But before she could response, she fainted.

* * *

When Elizabeth opened her eyes, she looked around her. She was not in her bedroom, she was somewhere she could not recognize. She closed again her eyes and she opened them only when she heard a noise, next to her, two hours later.

"Elizabeth..Elizabeth.." A sweet voice was heard next to her "please open your eyes"

"Jane?" Her voice was barely heard

"how are you, dear sister?" she asked and touched her hand

"Tired.." She paused "My leg...I cannot feel my leg"

"everything is going to be fine. The doctor said that you only sprained your ankle. You will be fine in a days" Jane hugged her sister

"What happened?" She asked worried

"Do you not remember?"

Elizabeth tried to think "ohh yes. Mr. Darcy found me"

"Yes, indeed. I thanked him for your behalf. I flow that you do not like him at all, but Lizzy, you must at least thank him"

"Jane, dear Jane, do not say that" she touched her sister's hand and dragged him closer to her "I do like him. I think I love him"

"In love with ? But I thought that you despised the man. Do be curious, Lizzy, how long have you loved him?"

"I hardly know, but I do Jane. Most passionately, but..." She paused "he's engaged."

"Engaged? To whom?"

"His cousin, Anne de Bourg" Jane touched her hand again "I had been such a fool, Jane. I should have accepted him the first time, he proposed."

"Did he proposed? Why did you refused him?"

"I had misjudged him. I wish I could take it back, but I cannot. It doesn't matter really, its over."

"Do not say that. If he loved you once, Im sure he is capable of doing it again. Maybe he is still in love with you."

Elizabeth laughed. It was the first time that Elizabeth had confided her affections in her sister. She could now feel relieved, she could take that burden off her. But before she could continue, the two sisters heard a knock on the door and couple of seconds later a man came in. And it was not just a man, it was Mr. Darcy. Immediately he bowed andElizabeth smiled politely. Jane excusing herself, she left them alone. She was sure that they had so many things to discuss.

"Mr. Darcy..I want to thank you for saving me today. You would have my eternal gratitude." she said and touched his hand.

Darcy shivered, he could feel the passion running through his spine. How much he loved her "You should not be obliged to such feelings. You know that I would do anything for you. "

"Yes, I know." she paused " ..I.."

He touched her hand "Do not say anything, you must rest now." he paused to kiss it "I will knock your door at night, if you feel anything, anything at all, let me in"

* * *

I want to thank everyone that has reviewed and followed my story. You dont know how much this means to me. Your opinions can make my day. So, I must thank you all. I love you! Tell me your thoughts about this chapter and what do you think is going to happen next? Do you think she is going to let him in or not? Hmm...I will wait for your reviews.

P.S Someone will read a letter soon.


	5. So close, miles apart

**Chapter five: So close, but miles apart. **

_Love knows not distance; it hath no continent; its eyes are for the stars. - Gilbert Parker_

As Darcy entered his room, he immediately sat on a chair, but in vain he could not calm himself. He had never felt more doomed in his entire life. She still despised him and if not so, then she certainly did not feel anything at all. All the hopes he gained from her letter, now they were vanished. He knocked, he knocked her door as he said he would do. But she did not reply. She did not care for him at all. How could he bare such an emptiness inside him? Because, with this rejection, she took away everything that was left to him. He was a dead man, indeed!

He needed something to drink, something strong. Not branch, he wanted whiskey. When he entered the drawing room, he found Bingley reading his book. But, without saying to him, he took the whole bottle with him and exited the room. This was going to be very hard. He was well aware that he was not going to forget her that easily, she was his life and everything that life, he wished it would be.

* * *

The next morning, Darcy could still feel the emptiness inside him. The drink had not helped at all, neither the sleep. He was seated, with the Bingley family in the dinning room, taking breakfast. While, brother and sister were talking, he kept looking at his full plate.

"Mr. Bingley" Jane yelled as she entered the room "We must call the doctor"

Everyone stood up, and approached the young lady, who seemed to be out of breath "What happened, dear?" her fiance asked.

"My sister" she cried "She is not well at all, she is burning up"

Darcy stopped breathing for one moment, he was going to lose her, not that she was his. But no, not this. He could not let her die, he could not let her leave him in that way. "I'll go and fetch the doctor, immediately"

"I am going to lose her, am I not?" She asked.

Everyone was going to lose her and especially Darcy himself, who had not even the chance to make her his, in the most honorable way at least.

* * *

The doctor said that she had a high fever, due to a cold, nothing to worry about. But, nobody could rest until they were certain that she was alright again. It was night when the doctor left and Jane, stayed at her sister's side. She had not woken up since yesterday and that was not very promising. But eventually when she did, she found Jane sleeping next to her, holding her hand. She looked so peaceful, like an angel.

Elizabeth had left more alive than before, she had her senses and her ankle did not hurt so much as it did before. Her fever had calmed down a little bit. She wore a plain white dress and her hair was not so perfect, but it did not matter really. She tried to stood up, but she could not move her left foot. With effort, she tried to stood up from bed silently, not to wake up Jane. When she finally did, she touched the wall, just to balance herself. Her ankle did hurt a lot when she tried to move it, so she tried not to. She approached the table just to drink water. She was so exhausted, but she could not fall asleep again. The best way to entertain herself was to find a book. She looked around the room just to find one, but in vain, there was none.

It took her almost half an hour to reach the library of Netherfield. It was not far from the room she was, but her ankle did not help her move quickly. In fact, she left like she was walking like a turtle, or even slower. When, she finally entered, she immediately gone to the poem section. All she wanted now, was to read Byron. He always helped her relax and it seemed to be her best companion lately. No, even though she loved Pope and his reality , it was Byron she needed.

But when she was about to take away the book with her, she remembered his words. _"Let me in... "_ She stopped breathing. She had totally forgot that he was here. But, did he really knock? She could not remember a thing. Maybe he did, when she was asleep. But if he really did, that meant that he thought her indifferent. But she wasnt. What a mess! For one second, she thought that she should immediately explain to him and make amends, but her second thought prevented her. Because, she remembered Lady Catherine. "_He's engaged to my daughter, what do you say about that now?" _She touched the wall again to prevent herself from falling, her ankle did hurt enormously, but that was not the only cause. Her legs were shaking. With effort, she sat on the chair, just to gain strength. She remained there couple of seconds, but when she tried to stood up again, she could not. She opened the book and started to read a little bit, for she hadn't anything else to do. Obviously, she had to wait a little longer, so her ankle would not hurt so bad.

* * *

"Elizabeth" she heard a voice near her ear "Wake up"

She tried hard to open her eyes and when she did, she found Darcy in front of her. Immediately, she blushed. He was not formally attired, he wore a loose white shirt reviling his chest. She looked outside the window, it was still night, in fact midnight. "Mr. Darcy..."

"How did you move?" he asked all concern, but when he realized how foolish his question was, he smiled a little.

"I couldn't sleep, so I thought that a book would help me to do so. But, when I was about to leave, I could not." she paused "What are you doing here?"

"I had the same thought." he paused to look at her form "How are you? Has the fever calmed down?"

"A little bit I think. What do you intend to read?"

"Byron" Elizabeth laughed. "But I see, we had the some thought again"

"Indeed. I find Byron very useful, when I want to sleep" They both laughed.

"But, honestly, do you like his style of writing? I find him too sentimental for my own tastes."

"Indeed, he has a tendency to be very dramatic, when it comes to unreturmed love. Don't you think?"

"Yes." he paused "Do you think that a person can actually endure such a pain?"

"Yes, I am confident that a person can endure a great loss, although its upon his affections, whether they will still exist or not. If they are true and strong from the beginning, they will survive."

"I think you are right. But, I believe that such a loss, makes you half man. It takes away every sparkle, every dream and every hope you had before. It changes you."

"Every decision we take, can change us, for better or worse. But, we must have strength and not let anything alter what we previously thought or felt. I believe that this is the true meaning of finding yourself. No matter how much we hurt, we must never let it overtake us."

"It is very hard and in the most cases impossible."

Are they were talking about them again? Elizabeth blushed, as she remembered again his letter. She was his unreturned love? That could not be so, because it was not unreturned. She loved him as well, more than she could admit to herself. After couple of seconds of akward silence, Darcy finally spoke

"May I escord you back to your room?"

"No" she immediately said "I think I cannot walk, my ankle still hurts very much"

"I can lift you up, I have done it before," he offered, but his voice came out severe, like he was mad.

"No, that is highly improper, think if someone see us." she paused "Afterall, Jane is sleeping and I do not want to wake her up, she has done so much for me."

"Do you intend to stay here then? That will not help you improve your condition"

"I will be fine" she said and handing him the book that she previously reading it "You can borrow it, I will not need it anymore."

"No, of course not. You should read it" he tried to give it back but she refused.

"Goodnight" she said. A second later, she saw Darcy moving away, but before he attempt to open the door, he returned again and stood next to her.

"I will keep you company." he paused "I cannot take Byron away from you. We will have to share him."

"What do you suggest?"

"Do you not want me to read you?"

"But you must be very tired, I do not want to impose you any further. You must go rest"

But before, she could continue, he spoke "I insist"

He knew that even if she did not love him, he could not be able to forget her that easily. He would not be able not to care about her. He could wait a few days, until she was recovered. But at that moment, where they were together, he wished a dreadful thing. He wished not to recover soon, so he could be next to her as much as possible. He did not want to leave, he wanted to stay there with her for the rest of his life, but no. No, it was something that he wanted and he could not force her to desire something that she did not. Until she was recovered and then he would return to his home, with no intention of coming back again.

* * *

I hope that you are approve of this chapter. But if you do not, let me know why. If you would like you can suggest me what do you want to see next, because I see a little block in front of me, I am out of ideas and I find it hard to write. Review!

Thank you so far for the follows and the reviews, i love you all so dearly. I hope I will see you in a few days. I want to thank especially those who english is not their first language and take the trouble of reading my story (like Trinio, or loulou25, malou etc). Reviews, which are not in english, I translate them so I can understand you, so do not worry about it. You must know, that I reply to those who have questions or want to contact me. Furthermore, I want to thank every single of you that have stick with my story. You do not know how important, this is to me.


	6. Farewell, my love

**Chapter six: Farewell, my love**

_Never say goodbye because goodbye means going away and going away means forgetting. - J.M Barrie_

Darcy could not feel his arm, so with effort he tried to open his eyes. Elizabeth had laid next to him on the couch, she was sleeping. They must have slept,while he was reading. He looked the big clock in front of him, it was still night. He looked down on Elizabeth again, she looked so peaceful, so beautiful, so tempting. How much he wanted to wake up like that for the rest of his life.

He tried to move, but he could not. Elizabeth's head was touching his arm, if he was about to move, he could wake her up. He tried to move again a little bit, when he heard her voice "Do not move, please" Darcy immediately froze and stood still. Gently, he touched her hand, and she squeezed it a little. He smiled.

Elizabeth immediately opened her eyes as she realized, where she was. They had fallen asleep, while Mr. Darcy was reading poerty. She looked up at him just to see him looking back at her, smiling. She instantly stood up.

"Oh my god, Mr. Darcy. I had no intention to sleep, I..." She paused "I am so sorry, I should not have..." She blushed.

"Do not make yourself uneasy, I just woke up as well" he smiled a little

"I am so ashamed" she said an looked down on her lap

"Do not be! It is really no importance"

But before he could continue, she interrupted him "I should probably go to my chambers". She stood up, but she immediately fell back on the couch, she could not walk at all. "...Or maybe not"

"Can you not walk at all?" She nodded. "Let me.." He said and touched her hands

"No." she almost yelled. No, she did not want to lift her, she did not even want to touch her, it was too much for her. She could not put herself into that kind of situation, where she could not get out. She already knew that she was in love with him, but touching her, hugging her, feeling his body so close to her, no, that would not do. She was not going to forget him that easily and that should not happen. He was engaged, for god sake!

"The servants are gone to bed and I will make sure that your sister will not hear us."

"She is a very light sleeper." she hesitated. "Ill wait here, until she wakes up. I am sure that would not be a problem."

"If you insist upon it then, as you wish." he stood up "But please, at least laid down"

Elizabeth laid down and opened the book, trying to read it "Goodnight."

Darcy sat on the desk, taking out some papers "Oh no, I am not going anywhere, if you do not mind."

She smiled. Why he should be so kind and caring? Why he should be so lovable? After a minute of silence, when she stopped reading, she finally said "Mr. Darcy.." She paused until he turned his look at her "I thank you"

He smiled and without saying anything at all he returned to the letter, he was writing.

* * *

The next two days passed quite dull, at least for Elizabeth. She was forced to be in her room, when everyone else was out, enjoying the weather. The maid, who used to take care of her, when Jane was not, came into Elizabeth's chambers to inform her that the dinner would be soon served and she gave her a letter that Mr Darcy gave her before he went out to give to her. She said that she found it under the sofa and that Elizabeth's name was written on it, so she took the liberty of giving it to her. Elizabeth thanked her and she put the letter in the open book, that she was reading. But when the maid was about to leave, Jane came in.

"How are you this morning, Lizzy?"

"Bored Jane, I cannot longer stay locked up in here"

Her sister sat next to her, taking the book away from her hands and put it on the desk "Do not be unjust, sister, mama and Lydia were here yesterday to keep you company"

They both laughed. "Where did you go?"

"We take a walk near the neighborhood, but Mr. Darcy said that he had to take care some business. He left."

Elizabeth froze. "Why?"

"He said that he had to go to London, but I do not know why" she paused as she touched her sister's hand "Will you miss him?"

"Yes." she admitted "But I suppose it is for the best."

"For whom?"

"For both of us, Jane. We cannot suffer anymore, knowing that we will not be together"

"But, Lizzy he loves you and you love him back. Why do you make things complicated?"

Elizabeth laughed ironically "Because they are, Jane they are" she yelled. She let some tears fall down her cheeks "He's engaged and I am not going to ruin his life"

Jane hugged her, just to calm her down and when Elizabeth finally stopped crying, Jane sang to her a night song that it helped them fall asleep, when they were little. And they actually did.

* * *

It was dinner time, when Elizabeth woke up again. She was alone in the room, which was expected. She opened the book, which she was previously reading, when she found his letter. She had totally forget about it. But there it was, waiting for her to be opened. So she did.

_Dearest,_

_everyone are long retired and to sleep. Now, the night far advanced, the house silent, I alone remain awake, at last free to speak to you as I choose. But do not be alarmed, this would be my last letter, at least a letter of this kind. Yes, I'm willing to say it again! Heart of mine, I crave your bold glance, I long for the tender warmth of you look; I welcome your advency, and prize it. You have touched me more profoundly than I thought I could ever be touched. The important thing is I do not want to be without you for the next twenty years, or fourty ot however may there are. I've gotten very used to being near you. And I wish, from the bottom of my heart that you wish that too, me and you, together, for an eternity. Because, I know that I'll never be happy with anyone else, as long as you walk the earth, my dear._

_The reason of confessing those feelings again is that I am confused. You letter, which I received weeks ago, permited me to think and hope something I did not allowed myself before. But, days ago, when I asked you to let me into your room, I found the door shut. You were ill and I suppose that you must be sleeping. At least, that is what I hope, it happened._

_I beg you to give me this time a clear answer, but please do before I am gone. My sister is ill and I must go to her, but I will come back for you, if you ask me to. For I beg to know expressly your intentions towards the love between us. Necessity comples me to obtain this answer, for I am more than a year wounded by the dart of love. And, I am not yet sure whether I shall fail or find a place in your affections. But if not, I swear to you, my love, that I shall never bring up those sentiments again, I will bury the, deep down in my heart, I swear._

She could barely breathe, as she finished the letter. She was crying again. Because she knew, that was the very end.

* * *

So, here is the letter I've promised you. Tell me what do you think about it. And of course, tell me if you liked this chapter. Review please!

P.S Check out the previous one, if you have not yet, because I am not sure If you did. Only two of you actually reviewed, which is depressing. But, if in this chapter your opinions, remain the same on number, I will stop my story. Because it is pointless to write, if no one is reading.


	7. Regret and Redemption

**Chapter seven: Regret and Redemption**

_I am seated in a bench, _

_thinking of you again,_

_but is no wonder at all,_

_because you all I ever want._

_I think of my actions once again,_

_and I do regret all the things I never said._

_I was blind and cold, _

_I did not know how to love._

_Forgive me, my eternal love, _

_it was not my intention at all, _

_to leave you thus, paining so much._

_At least I am not bitter anymore, _

_because i know that you did love me so._

_I am sorry that we were doomed to be apart,_

_that our love never had a start._

_But I suppose that is destiny's fault,_

_for not giving us a chance to share this love._

_But, do not be afraid my soul, _

_for we would be together soon, _

_we will see each other once more,_

_there is heaven's doors,_

_because my soul can ever dissever from yours*_

* * *

Darcy wanted desperately to sleep, but the carriage seat was too uncomfortable, so he could not. How could he be so wrong about her? He thought that he was a chance with her, he knew deep down that she felt something, that she had a little sparkle inside her. But, obviously not, he was mistaken. She did not feel the slightest attraction, nor affection towards him. He sent her the letter, declaring his love once again and for the last time, he said that he would never mention those kind of feelings again. She did not care about him at all. How could she be so cruel and heartless? Couldn't she see that this love consumed him? But it was over now, anyway. Over for good. He had to move on, but did he have the strentgth to do so. But, he had to.

It hurts to let go. Sometimes it seems the harder you try to hold on to something or someone the more it wants to get away. You feel like some kind of criminal for having felt, for having wanted. For having wanted to be wanted. The reason it hurts so much to separate is because their souls are connected. Maybe they always have been and will be. Maybe they've lived a thousand lives before this one and in each of them they've found each other. And maybe each time, they've been forced apart for the same reasons. That means that this goodbye is both a goodbye for the past ten thousand years and a prelude to what will come.

He thought of Georgiana and her sickness. She was the only one, who could take his mind off Elizabeth right now. In the letter, he received from her, she said that the flu had bad effects on her and she had high fever for two days. He must take care of her, she is the only one left anyway.

* * *

Ten days later...

Elizabeth at last home. She had missed her family, but especially her father, who loved most in the world. Jane after that day in Netherfield never mentioned Mr. Darcy, for she knew very well that this subject could still hurt her feelings. It was a wound, still bleeding. She knew well, that her sister was loyal and devoted to a person that she felt things for. And, was not going to be an exception, especially when she loved him so. She never heard her be thrilled about a man before, or anyone person at all. Darcy must be very special, indeed!

Elizabeth had not slept well since the day that he left. She always woke up in the middle of night, sweating and afraid. She missed him, everyday that was passing. She had missed their conversations, his smile and the way he treated her. And in moments of honesty, she had regret the things she never said or never did. She should have shown him, what she felt. Even if they were not going to be together, they deserved to have their moments. How selfish and blind was she! She should have giving them a chance, but again that meant that she had to put aside everything she was. She deserved a kiss, at least. A goodbye kiss from the only man she loved, or ever will, even though he was engaged. But is over now... so she should not give trouble on such thoughts. Because, regretting what you never did is the worst thing that can happen in any human being. The feelings that hurt most, the emotions that sting most, are those that are absurd - The longing for impossible things, precisely because they are impossible; nostalgia for what never was; the desire for what could have been; regret over not being someone else; dissatisfaction with the world's existence.

And that was the time she realized that she was wrong. It did not hurt too much to love him, but the truth was that it hurt much more not to. They were linked together, someway, in a very extraordinary way. Afterall, there is no intensity of love or feeling that does not involve the risk of crippling hurt. It is a duty to take this risk, to love and feel without defense or reserve. But she was wrong, she should have taken that risk. They deserved it. Destiny can hurt a person as much as it can bless them, and that moment of pure frankness she found herself wondering why, out of all the people in all the world she could ever have loved, she had to fall in love with someone who was taken away from her.

* * *

I am so happy! Thank you so so much for your lovely reviews. You have given me so much love and strength to continue. I do love you all.

There are so emotions here. This chapter is small and there is no major events happening, but I had to write it, so I could clarify their feelings, when the other chapters are about to there are going to be some huge changes, which I hope that you are thrilled to know. So, review. Please. Tell me what you think. I promise that the next chapter is going to be promising.

But, I am very proud of this chapter, I am proud that I could portrayed such feelings. And in someway, I feel relieved, because I put some of myself in this. I put thoughts that I have always had, but I could not reveal. Things I have felt, because we all have felt heartbroken. Do you see the similarity?

*This is a poem that I wrote when I was writing this chapter and I thought that I should publish it. It is the feelings from Elizabeth's point of view when she realized her faults. I know it is not a great poem, maybe a silly one, however I want to know what you think of it. Tell me if you like it or not! Pleaseee...


	8. Let the love kill you

**Chapter eight: Let the love kill you  
**_"I was young and I did not know how to love."  
_

* * *

_My dear, find what you love and let it kill you. Let it drain you of your all. Let it cling onto your back and weigh you down into eventual nothingness. Let it kill you and let it devour your renains. For all thing will kill you, both slowly and fastly, but it is much more better to be killed by a lover. Falsery yours._

* * *

Ten days later…  
Elizabeth was in the drawing room, alone and confused. She was alone, because all her family had visited Netherfield as they used to do the last few days and as for the latter, she was confused because she received a proposal. It was from Georgiana Darcy. She invited her to stay a week in Pemberley, claiming that she felt so lonely because all her friends had left her and she needed company. As for her brother, Fitzwilliam Darcy, he had gone to London to take care some business.  
Elizabeth stared at the letter, which her friend had written with so much care, for couple of minutes. She fought with herself for the rest of the day, she fought her mind, which was telling her not to go, but her heart, which was aching, won. She was determined to go; she could not let down a friend, and especially her, who had a special place in her heart. Not only like a lovely girl, but as a sister, she was afterall the sister of the man she loved.

Two days later, she was in the garden with Georgiana. They loved to sit next to each other and read poetry, especially Byron. The afternoons, Georgiana played the pianoforte and learned to Elizabeth some new pieces. But that moment, there on the garden, under the hot sun, Elizabeth wished that she could call her sister, because she thought her as one. She wished to spend the rest of her days in that home, sitting on that bench each morning and finally to call such a beautiful estate, home. But most of all, she wished that she was his wife. She wished with all her heart that Darcy could have her in his possession, to love her as he loved himself, or even more.  
But that was not possible, or maybe not?

"Elizabeth…" Georgiana almost yelled just to catch her attention. "What are you thinking?"

"It is nothing Georgiana, really" she lied.

"My brother says my exact same thing to me, everytime I ask him, but I do not believe him, just like I do not now."

"I'm telling you the truth." She simply said.

Georgiana smirked. "I should be happy that my brother is getting married" she paused "but somehow I am not"

"What?"

"I thought you knew." She paused again, Elizabeth's heart stopped for one second, she even forgot to breathe "Your sister should have told you, since you are invited. It's a double marriage"

"Georgiana what are you talking about?"

"My brother is getting married the same day your sister does. But honestly…"

"Whom?" Elizabeth almost screamed.

"Our cousin, Anne de Bourg."

"I see" Elizabeth simply said and looked her lap. So, it was really the end. He is getting married in less than a month.

"I'm surprised though, that arranged things so quickly." She paused to think "He asked for her hand, a week ago"

"What are you talking about? Wasn't he engaged to her for years?"

Georgiana touched her hands "No, of course not. Lady Catherine plans this engagement, since he was infant, but I did not believe that he would actually consent."

Elizabeth forgot to breathe. But he was engaged, Lady Catherine told her. How could that be true? "I do not understand"

"I thought…" Georgiana said almost in tears "Do not tell me that is the reason, why.." Elizabeth nodded and Georgiana turned pale. She loved him, she was in love with him the whole time. Elizabeth was in love with her brother, but everything was ruined now. "Do you still love.."

But before she could finish her sentence, Elizabeth nodded. "It is alright Georgiana" she said and took her hand in hers. "Everything will be alright."

But, the truth was that Elizabeth did not believe the things she said. It was not alright, nor will be. There is an odd moment in a person's life that they are watching their whole world fall apart, and all they can do is stare blankly. That is the worst moment, when you feel you have lost the desires for all that was most desirable, before you are contented with what you can desire; before you know what is left to be desired, and you go on wishing that you could desire, what desires had left behind. But you cannot understand. How could you understand what is to feel empty?

He was not engaged; all this time he loved her. But she loved her back. He got engaged, just because he thought that she did not have any affection towards him. What she was supposed to do with her life now? She ruined everything. She tried so hard not to cry, but that was a bit pointless. She did, in front of Georgiana. She cried until she could not breathe any longer. Georgiana hugged her tight and Elizabeth finally wiped her tears.  
A few times in someone's life, there is absolute clarity, when for a few brief seconds the silence drowns out the noise and the person can feel rather than think, and things seem so sharp. And the world seems so fresh as though it had all just come into existence. The person can never make these moments last, because they fade. And that was happening in Elizabeth's case. It is very hard to realize that your life had or will have anything meaning, nor future. The future that every person dreams and stays alive for; a better one. How could that happen when she felt empty? When she was empty, she was indeed. Without him, at least.

* * *

Elizabeth was in the drawing room hearing Georgiana's performance, when they both of them stood up when they heard the door opening. But before Elizabeth could face the person, she heard a voice. A very familiar voice, the same voice she could make her shivered. Fitzwilliam's Darcy voice.

"Georgiana" he yelled "I am back!" Georgiana immediately run into his arms and hugged him very tight. But just then, he saw Elizabeth standing in front of him, looking the floor. She was quite red and ashamed.

"I invited Elizabeth, since you were gone and..." his sister said, but before she could continue, he interrupted.

"How are you, Miss Bennet?" he asked with his cold, severe voice. Elizabeth finally looked up at him, just to see him looking her intensively.

"I am very well, thank you" she replied and looked down again.

How could that even be possible? How could she be here, in his home when he was away? How much he would loved to hug her, smell the perfume and stay in her arms forever. And in that peculiar moment, Darcy cursed himself for engaging himself to someone, who did not love. He should have stayed, fought for her love. Make her love him back even if it was in vain. How stupid he had behaved, but he was young and he did not know how to love. But hearts can break. Yes, hearts can break. And sometimes it is best if we died, when they did. But we do not.

* * *

_I know this chapter as the previous one is somehow depressing to some of you. But, I swear that the next one is not. Please comment and tell me what do you think of this chapter and if I should continue. I want to thank once more everyone, who has followed and reviewed my story. You guys, give me power to carry on.  
P.S. Tell me what you want to see and maybe I will do it.  
_


	9. Comprehension

**Chapter nine: Comprehension **  
_True love will triumph in the end –which may or may not be a lie, but if it is a lie, then it is the most beautiful lie we have._

Elizabeth was in the grand library of Pemberley, reading Byron again, when the Darcy brothers came in. She immediately closed the book and looked straight at them, observing their figures, until they finally sat on the couch.

"What are you reading Elizabeth?" Georgiana asked and looked at her brother.

"Byron." She simply said.

She touched his hand and said "But I thought you did not prefer him"

"Indeed" she smiled "But I have started reading this and it would be a shame not to finish it."

"I though that you preferred Byron, when you were about to sleep" Darcy interrupted.

She laughed "That is true, indeed" She smiled to him. It was one of those rare smiled of reassurance. She faced –or seemed to face- the whole world for a moment and then he focused upon it. She comprehended you as much as you wanted to be understood, she believed in you as much as you wanted to be believed she reassured you that she had the exact same impression, which you hope to have at your best moments and you wished to give it to others.

"But do tell me what is your opinion about love?" he asked as though he had a hard time to breathe.

"Oh love.." she paused to think "Love is life. All, everything I understand, I understand only because I love. Everything is, everything exists because I love." He smiled, pleased with her answer, still holding his sister's hand. "But, I would love to hear what a man like you believes about that sentiment."

"What I think about love." He laughed ironically "It is an illusion"

"What about religion?" she asked again

"The fashionable substitute for belief" he replied quickly, looking intensively at her.

"You are sceptic."

"Never! Sceptism is the beginning of faith."

"What are you?" she asked as though her life depended on his answer.

"To define is to limit."

Georgiana quickly replied, before Elizabeth could respond "You speak, brother, as though you have no feelings, that you see the world like a mathematical equation. But I know very well that this is not true." She paused and turned her look on Elizabeth "What do you think Elizabeth?"

Her heart almost stopped, but when she felt Darcy's eyes upon her, she blushed. "I think that Georgiana is right. You speak as though you find comfort in crushing someone's optimism."

"But I do not, I assure you" he paused "I am nothing special; of this I am sure. I am a common man with common thoughts, and I've lived a common life. There are no monuments decided to me and my name will soon be forgotten, but I've loved another person with all my heart and soul, and to me, this has always been enough"

She smiled to him. She smiled like she understood his meaning, which she did. She meant her, and when she realized, she blushed. "I am sure"

And that led Darcy to the belief that miracles, no matter how inexplicable or unbelievable are, they can occur without regard to the natural of things. How blessed he felt that moment, when he finally realized that Elizabeth never doubted his love, that she was giving in. At least, he could sleep peaceful at night from now on.

"Do you think that everything happens for a reason?" Elizabeth asked.

"Most certainly. We become stronger after every fight, afterall what does not kill you makes you stronger, does it not? Things happen for a reason, just to give us the time to realize what we want and need, and finally get prepared to fight for our finest hour." he replied with his severe voice and he stopped holding his sister's hand.

"I believe that we must struggle to get the desires of our heart, even if the attempts are going to fail." Georgiana interrupted looking Elizabeth. Was that a warning? That she should fight for her brother's love, but that she had it. She knew that he loved her, what she had not was him. She was not in her possession. "I think we must always be aware of the possibility of total defeat, whether the reason for that defeat seems right or wrong, an early taste of death is not necessarily a bad thing."

Realizing her meaning, Elizabeth said "How shall I lose the sin, yet keep the sense and love the offender, but yet detest the offence?"

"That is something, dearest Elizabeth, you have to decide alone. Whether you are capable of doing half of them while you would ignore the rest." Georgiana replied. But how could Elizabeth find the courage to reveal her feelings to Darcy, when she knew that he was prepared to make his own path, away from her? How could that be so selfish not to think of others and the disaster she would cause?

"Are you talking of something specific?" Darcy asked innocently, because honestly he had no idea what they were referring to.

"No!" they both yelled the same time.

"I should leave you, pray excuse me. I have a new piece from Schubert that I have to finish."

But, before anyone would protest, she was gone. After couple of seconds Elizabeth finally spoke "Mr. Darcy, I do not want to impose on your hospitality any longer. You should probably want to stay with your sister."

Darcy looked at her. He wanted to remember her features and expression, by looking at her he could feel the light inside of him. He could feel his bones, moving. "Do not worry. You are welcome to stay as much as you wish"

She nodded. "Are you well?"

"I am fine." he simply replied

"I am sorry that I have not yet congratulate you"

Darcy immediately stood up "What for?"

"Your wedding."

Immediately, he walked towards the window, he found a comfortable position and looked outside. It was the door, which distracted him from his thoughts and then he remembered that he was talking with Elizabeth. He looked around with his eyes, to find her from, but in vain she was already on the hall. Understanding that he wanted some privacy, that he needed to think, Elizabeth exited the room. But, the truth was not only that. In fact, she could not longer hold her tears. She loved the man, for chrissake! But, before she could reach her chamber, a hand grabbed her arm, making her stop. It was Darcy.

He made her turned around and face him "I am sorry"

"What for?"

"For everything." He simply said and pushed her a little bit closer towards him. "Why are you crying?"

"I am not" she lied

"Do not play with me, Elizabeth, I do not deserve it"

"I have ruined everything, have I not?"

"No, you have not. We both did" he replied and pushed her towards him, now she was almost in his arms

"I am sorry, for hurting you"

He laughed. "I do not have a heart, have you not heard?"

She laughed and Darcy wiped her tears with his thumb. "Everything will be as they should be, will they not? You said that everything happens for a reason"

"Yes." He touched her cheek with his palm "True love will triumph in the end –which may or may not be a lie, but if it is a lie, then it is the most beautiful lie we have."

"It is not"

* * *

Many of you keep asking things and some of you are guests, so I cannot reply you personally. So here are the answers.

_*Why the last two chapter are so depressing?_  
I am very fond of my story and I am trying to write it the best way I can. So, I thought it more accurate to portray their feelings, the best way I could. I wanted to make their sentiments more understandable in a way that the reader could feel them, as though they were his. Think that the characters believe that their love is doomed and that they will never be together. It is natural to feel that way, I believe.

_*Are they going to be together in the end?_  
Yes, I've always believed that true love is going to triumph in the end, no matter what the reasons of their breakup are. Love is a strong feeling that cannot be muted. So, in the case of our couple, happy ending is going to happen soon. In fact, they will be together shortly than you think.

_*Why Darcy got engaged to Anne?_  
When he confessed his love to Elizabeth for the second time, he did not got any reply. He said that he will not going to bring up those affections again, if she does not want to. So, as desperated and heartbroken was he, he finally consented to marry Anne, as it was expected. He believed that he was doomed and he had not another option.

*****_Are they going to untangle their misunderstanding?_  
Yes, indeed they are going to. Very soon. Elizabeth is going to give him the reason why she did not return his affections, even if she wanted to.

If you have any other questions, please ask, I would love to answer them. I hope that you are not so disappointed with me and that you will continue to read my story. Tell me what you think! Please review and follow. I cannot continue if you are not. I want to heat your opinions.

Btw. I hope that many of you are happy with this chapter, since you are so eager to get them together and solve their misunderstandings.


	10. Let the game begin

**Chapter ten: Let the game begin**

_"She was the toast to his butter"_

"I should get dressed for dinner" she said and took some steps away from him.

"Yes, you are right." He paused and came closer "I will see you in a while"

But, before Elizabeth could turn around, Darcy was already in front of her, taking her hand. He slowly and passinately kissed her palm. She shivered. What a strange effect he had on her, she thought.

When Elizabeth was in the dinning room, sat on the left of Darcy, who was seated in the head of the table. And just as she sat, under the table she grabbed Fitzwilliam's hand, giving him a piece of paper. In fact, it was not only a piece, it must have been more than two pages, because the folding was not a thick one. He carefully put it in his pocket and grabbed again her hand, not letting it go. He put it on his lap and with his fingers, he gently drew careless lines on her palm. But, when Elizabeth tried to move it away, he quickly grabbed it and squeezed it. He was determined not to let her go! She belonged to him, now. She was in his possession and he was not going to let anything take her away from him ever again.

* * *

_My dear Mr Darcy,_

_I have been thinking what should I say to you, how should I explain myself. But, I believe it is your right to know the reasons why I should not welcomed your affections. Afterall, I truly think that it is my fault and I cannot blame myself any longer. This is the end, you are getting married and I am about to return home soon. I know I am about to mention a hurtful subject, but I beg you no matter how I bad I have hurt you, I need your forgiveness. Give it to me, please._

_First of all, let me start from the beginning. Before I received your first letter, I spoke with your aunt. Not only did she hurt me and embarrassed me in the most terrible way, but she also informed me about your so-called engagement. I can admit that I was a fool for believing her, but my feelings did not let me see clearly the truth. I did not want to be the reason for destroying your life, nor I wanted to get ashamed for choosing me as your wife. The things you said in your first proposal and the similar reasons your aunt mentioned, persuaded me that you are both right. I do not deserve to be your wife, I can aknwnodege that now, but that does not mean that my heart does not hop everytime I see you._

_Yes, there I've said it. My love for you is bigger than I could imagine. My heart stops everytime you are near me and your touch is everything I desire. I love you with a love that it is more than love or can be explained. I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you simply, without problems or pride: I love you in this way because I do not know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no I or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand, so intimate that when I fall asleep your eyes close. I love you. I am who I am because of you. You are every reason, every hope, and every dream I've ever had, and no matter what happens to us in the future, everyday we are together is the greatest day of my life. Remember, I will always be yours. We fell in love, despite our differences, and once we did, something rare and beautiful was created. For me, love like that has only happened once, and that's why every minute we spent together has been seared in my memory. I'll never forget a single moment of it._

_I should leave you now, I am already late for dinner. Please, after reading this letter and If you still want to see me, come to me. The only thing that I want from you now is to tell me that I am forgiven. Afterall, that is what we can have from now on, words will be our greatest friend._

_Always yours,_

_Elizabeth_

* * *

I know that you can see a great difference upon her behavior, that is why she could not reveal her feelings. Now, she found the time to let him know. I am so happy that I have already writteten chapters.

I hope that you are pleased with this chapter and grateful, because I am uploading for quite a while now everyday. I do not want to keep you suspense. I know that there are not many of you, who keep reading my story but I am going to finish it for those lovely people who have stick to it. I am thankful to all of you, who spend their time reviewing and reading. Send me your love and opinions about this chapter by reviewing. Tell me what you want to see next. It is so important to me, because I am feeling a little depressed and I need someone to cheer me up.


	11. Kiss my soul

**Chapter eleven: Kiss my soul**

_"For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul." -Judy Garland_

It was late that night,the same day that she gave him the letter, when Elizabeth heard a knock on the door, she quickly put on her night robe and opened the door just to see Mr. Darcy in front of her. He had his usual severe expression and to her amazement, he wore his night clothes, a white transparent shirt and dark blue breeches. She never imagined him being so tempting that could make her blush.

"Is something wrong?"

"Yes...no." he said troubled. Elizabeth realizing his distress, she asked him to sit down And of course he consented. Darcy sat on the couch and Elizabeth found a comfortablesit exactly opposite to him. She kept looking at him, waiting to start his speech. "I am sorry for waking you up, but I could not rest. I've tried to sleep, but I could not. There is a matter I want to discuss with you." He paused "I've read your letter"

Elizabeth's heart stopped. "I hope that it did not caused you distress"

"Not really. On the contrary..." He said and stood up, approaching her. He comfortably sat next to her and took her hand in his. "Do you love me?"

She nodded. "Can you forgive me?"

"Dearest, loveliest Elizabeth..." he replied as he kissed he hand and pushed he a little bit closer to him.

"Tell me, have you forgiven me?"

He touched her cheek with his hand, making her look directly on his blue eyes. "Of course, I have forgiven you." He paused "I love you, Elizabeth, with all my heart and soul"

"I know" she smiled.

"Tell me that you love me. I need to hear it"

"I love you, Fitzwilliam"

And with that, Darcy gently touched his lips with hers. It was that kind of kissed that could leave you breathless, maybe it was not a passionate one, but it could pierce your soul. He kissed her like there was no tomorrow, like her breath was his ear, the kind of kiss that made her know that she was never so happy in her whole life. As they slowly moved away from each other, Darcy started kissing her cheek and then moved a little bit lower, just on her neck. But suddenly, Elizabeth put her hand on his, where he had placed it on her waist, making him stop.

She looked at him in the eyes and said "No, this is not proper."

"I am not going to force you into something you are not prepared for."

"No, it is not that. It's.." she paused "You are getting married, have you forgotten?"

He quickly stood up and took some steps away from her "Come, I want to show you something"

Some minutes later, Elizabeth without realizing it, she was already on his room. She was standing on the middle of the master bedroom and before she could speak, Darcy grabbed her hand and gave her a piece of paper. She quickly opened it, just to see a sketch of a lady.

"I made Georgiana do it for me" he paused "I wanted to remember you". He quickly approached her and touched her face, just to kiss her gently again. "Stay with me tonight. I do not want you to be away from me again, at least not now that I have found you"

"You know that it is highly inappropriate for me to be in your chambers."

"Yes, I am aware" he said and locked the door. "But, I do not think you have another choice,my dear"

"But what if.."

But before she could continue, he begged "Do not be cruel" he paused to hold her hands "Stay with me. Don't you trust me?"

They took to silence. They touched each other without comment and without progression. A hand on a hand, a clothed arm, resting on an arm. An ankle overlapping an ankle, as they sat on the bed, and not removed. They fell asleep, side by side... He slept curled against her back, a dark comma against her pale elegant phrase.

* * *

Elizabeth felt a sweet touch on her cheek, and she could hear another's person breaths. She slowly opened her eyes, just to see two beautiful eyes looking at her. Her heard was resting on his chest and his hand were gently touching her hair.

"Good morning" he said and kissed her forehead.

"Good morning"

"I never believed that waking up, would be so pleasant." He smiled "You look like an angel, when you are sleeping"

"How long have you been awake?"

"I am sorry for waking you up, but I could not keep my hands off you" he replied avoiding her question. The truth was, that Darcy had barely slept. His bliss could not make him rest and she smiled to him as though she knew. "What is it my dear?"

"How can we bear it?"

"Bear what?"

"This." She paused just to touch his hand "For so short a time. How can we sleep this time away?"

He smiled. "We can be quiet together, and pretend - since it is only the beginning - that we have all the time in the world. And every day we shall have less. And then none."

"Would you rather, therefore, have had nothing at all?"

"No. This is where I have always been coming to. Since my time began. And when I go away from here, this will be the mid-point, to which everything ran, before, and from which everything will run. But now, my love, we are here, we are now, and those other times are running elsewhere."

She smiled and moved her head towards his and couple of seconds later, without speaking, she kissed him.

"I feel complete when I am with you, like the whole world stops when I am near you and starts when we are apart" she said and hugged him.

"I am happy that you are safe with me."

"I am not at all safe, with you. But I have no desire to be elsewhere."

And then he kissed her again. It was impossible for him to be away from her and if it wasn't, he did not want to. When her lips met his, he knew that he could live to be a hundred and visit every country in the world, but nothing would ever compare to that single moment when he first kissed the woman of his dreams, just hours ago. He knew that no matter how they would end up, he was not going to stop loving her, nor could he forget the taste of her lips, that made his whole body shiver from desire.

"Do you love me?" he asked her.

She smiled. "Yes."

He could not adequately describe the intensity of what he was felt at that moment. Love, anger, sadness, hope, and fear, whirling together sharpened by the nervousness he was feeling. He looked at her curiously and her breaths became shallower. Suddenly he knew that he had never felt as strongly for another person as he did at that moment. As she returned her gaze, this simple realization made his wish for the millionth time that he could make all this go away. Finally getting control of himself, he kissed her again, then brought his hand to her face, gently running his fingers over her cheek. He marveled at the softness of her skin, the gentleness he saw in her eyes. Even now she was perfect. His throat began to tighten again, he knew what he had to do. He smiled softly, and she returned his affection with a slight squeeze of his hand, as she trusting him in what he was about to do. Encouraged, he leaned closer and took a deep breath. When he exhaled, these were the words that flowed with his breath. "I want to make you mine."

* * *

I do not know what you think of this chapter, but I think I am in love with it. I am so proud, because I think I could not make it better. I just finished writing it and I updated it within the same day, because I wanted to please you since so many of you reviewed to the last one. If your reviews keep rising that way, I will do my best to update everyday.

It may seem to you that they are getting improper, but they are not. They want to be together no matter what. So, Tell me what do you think. Do you like it at all? Please, review! It is so important to me! Please tell me that I have not disappointed you.


	12. Meeting at night

**Chapter twelve: Meeting at night**

_The previous night, in Mr. Darcy's bedroom..._

Elizabeth had laid comfortably on the bed, which seems enormous comparing to those, she used to sleep. She gently rested her head on his arm and closed her eyes. She was so tired, like all her energy was used from that little converstation they had. The truth was that she felt consumed, exhausted by her feelings towards him. Darcy gently kissed her hair and took her hand in his.

"Say something" she broke the silence.

"What do you want to hear?"

"Anything" she replied as she kept her eyes closed.

"I love you."

She laughed. "I already know that. Tell me something I do not know."

"If I knew that today would be the last time I'd see you, I would hug you tight and pray the Lord be the keeper of your soul. If I knew that this would be the last time you pass through this door, I'd embrace you, kiss you, and call you back for one more. If I knew that this would be the last time I would hear your voice, I'd take hold of each word to be able to hear it over and over again. If I knew this is the last time I see you, I'd tell you I love you, and would not just assume foolishly you know it already"*

As he finished his speech, Elizabeth opened her eyes and looked at his, they kept staring at each other for a while, until she touched his cheek with her hand. She moved her head a little closer to his and she gently kissed his lips. Darcy pushed her even closer, so her body could touch his. He started kissing her neck and his hand rested comfortably around her waist. Elizabeth moved away from him slowly stood up. Darcy got pale.

"What is troubling you?" he asked

"I cannot do this anymore"

Darcy immediately stood up and approached her. "Do you not love me enough?"

"Of course, I do. But, It is not right. You are going to have a wife soon. It is not right for her either"

He grabbed her hand, making her turn around, just to face him "I do not love Anne, nor can I ever see her the way I see you."

"Yes, but you are going to kiss her in the same way you kiss me. You will sleep next to her, every night for the rest of your life." her voice broke "You are going to share your bed and even have children with her."

"No, I am not" he paused "I swear to you, Elizabeth that you are going to be the last woman, who I am going to kiss. And you are the only woman, who I love and I will always do." He touched her waist and pushed her to sit on the bed. "Do you see this bed? You are going to be the only woman, who sat or laid on it"

She smiled. "I love you so much"

"Let us not pain ourselves any longer and shavour the time we have together" he said and laid again next to her.

"You are right" she said and cuddled him.

To him she seemed so beautiful, so seductive, so different from ordinary people, that he could not understand why no one was as disturbed as he by the way she spoke, why no one else's heart was wild by the sight of her, why everyone did not go mad with the movements of her braid, the flight of her hands, the gold of her laughter. He had not missed a single one of her gestures while she fell asleep, nor had he lost the counting of the breaths she took. But, he did not dare to touch or move her for fear of destroying the spell.

* * *

* Quote by G. M. Marquez

This chapter was written because I wanted you to see how they spend their first night together, even though they had not moved on into intercourse. This is a little gift for you all, who keep giving me your love by reviewing. I have already wrote the next two chapters, so I can update them if you want. If the reviews reach to 140 then I am going to update the next chapter this afternoon.


	13. In a very unusual way

**A/N: **Do not forget to follow and fav, if you already have not, because all the follows have been deleted.

* * *

**Chapter thirteen: In a very unusual way***

_In a very unusual way, one time I needed you_

_In a very unusual way you were my friend_

_Maybe it lasted a day, maybe it lasted an hour_

_But somehow it will never end_

_In a very unusual way I think I'm in love with you_

_In a very unusual way I want to cry_

_Something inside me goes weak_

_Something inside me surrenders_

_And you're the reason why, you're the reason why_

_You don't know what you do to me, you don't have a clue_

_You can't tell what it's like to be me looking at you_

_It's scares me so that I can hardly speak_

_In a very unusual way I owe what I am to you_

_Though at times it appears I won't stay, I never go_

_Special to me in my life, since the first day that I met you_

_How could I ever forget you once you had touched my soul?_

_In a very unusual way you've made me whole._

* * *

Elizabeth's heart almost stopped, upon hearing his words that he wanted to make her his. She knew what he meant, but she did not if she was ready yet. She did love him, with all her heart, but she was not ready for that yet, of course, she wanted to be his in every way. But not now, at least. Seeing her face getting pale, Darcy knew that he had pushed her to her limits and immediately cursed himself for puttimg her in that position. He took her hand and kissed it.

"I did not want you to make something that you are not ready for"

She smiled and Darcy finally took a breath. "I know" she paused. "But, not yet"

Darcy took away his hand from hers and stood up to open the curtains. Elizabeth observed his figure as he stood next to the window, showing her his back. Elizabeth approached him and grabbed his hand, he immediately turned to look at her. Directly in the eyes.

"Are you cross?"

"No, of course not." He paused "You cannot possibly think so ill of me"

"No, I do not" she hugged him "What is wrong then?"

"You know that I cannot break this engagement" She nodded and he continued "Let us hope that God will show mercy to us and he is willing to do a miracle that will bring us together"

"But if he do not, will you still love me?" she asked and looked away.

Darcy immediately touched her face and made her look at his eyes "I will love you always. When this brown hair is white, I will still love you. When the smooth softness of youth is replaced by the delicate softness of age, I will still want to touch your skin. When your face is full of the lines of every smile you have ever smiled, of every surprise I have seen flash through your eyes, when every tear you have ever cried has left its mark upon your face,I will treasure you all the more, because I will be there to see it all. I will love you until the last breath leaves your body or mine."

"Think how you love me," she whispered. 'I don't ask you to love me always like this, but I ask you to remember."

"You'll always be like this to me.'

"Oh no; but promise me you'll remember." Her tears were falling. She was crying over the loss of something she never had. How ridiculous. Mourning something that never was - her dashed hopes, her dashed dreams, and her soured expectations. "I'll be different, but somewhere lost inside me there'll always be the person I am tonight"

"Do not cry" he whispered near her left ear, making her whole body shiver, as his thumb wiped her tears. His heart beat faster and faster as her face came up to his own. He knew that when he kissed her, and forever wed his unutterable visions to her perishable breath, his mind would never romp again. Then he kissed her. As his lips touched hers, she blossomed like a flower and the incarnation was complete.

"How would it feel to be always together yet forever apart?" she asked.

"We are not going to be apart. I may not always be with you, but when we're far apart, remember you will be with me, right inside my soul" he took her face in his hands "We are always going to be together, afterall we are linked to each other. Can you not see this?" She smiled, but the truth was that she felt hopeless and that was obvious. "I promise you, Elizabeth, I am going to find a way"

"I don't want just words. If that's all you have for me, I'd better go" she said and took some steps away. But, Darcy grabbed her hand, making her stop.

"Let us not discuss of this anymore." He paused and approached her "Say it."

"Say what?"

"Tell me what you told me before." His mouth opened and took a deep breath, he looked turtored, vulnerable.

"I love you."

"That's all I ever need to hear." He smiled.

"Those three words?"

"Always those three words" he replied and put his hand on her waist. He pushed her a little forward, just to feel her closer to him.

"You know Mr. Darcy, I have no intention for you to get spoiled." She teased.

"Do not tease me Miss Bennet" he smiled "You know I can take the upper hand."

She laughed ironically "Do you think I am willing to let you?" As she finished speaking, he quickly pressed her to his chest and she melt. Oh, this is where she wanted to be. She rested her head against him, and he kissed her hair repeatedly. This felt like home and for a moment, she allowed herself the illusion that all will be well, just to smooth her dark soul.

"Don't leave me," he whispered.

"I am not going to go!" she shouted "There, I've said it. I am not leaving."

"Good" he simply replied. "Now, let us go downstairs for breakfast, before anyone suspect."

But, before Elizabeth could move, Darcy hold her tight and kissed her once more. Pationate this time, like he wanted to take away from her, all the air she had inside her lungs. His tongue moved erotically, guiding hers, like they were dancing, in their own pace.

"You should be kissed everyday, every hour, every minute." he said.

"I love you now for what we've already shared, and I will love you in anticipation of all that's to come, even If they are not what I wanted or wished for or dreamed of. But, that does not mean that I will stop loving you. You need to be loved, afterall."

"I know that you love me and that is enough for me."

She leaned into him, and when he closed his eyes, he knew that he wanted nothing more than to hold her this way forever.

* * *

*If you have time to spare, just listen to the song "In a very unusual way" by B. Streisand.. And those are the lyrics to the song. Ohh how truly amazing they are. I have fallen in love with it recently and I think I was inspired to write this chapter. I've been singing it even in my sleep.

I love you all, you should know that. You are the best readers ever! You make my day everytime I hear sth from you, that is why I keep my updates so regular. Especially now that I Know that I have your support... I logged in and checked out my story and I was literally amazed when I saw the reviews and all those lovely comments. I want to thank everyone of you. The love you sent me was Extraordinary! I almost cried. I love you!

Some of you are not very fond of Darcy's behavior, because he reveals his feelings and thoughts to Elizabeth. Some of you say that he is becoming dishonorable, but I do not think that it is true. He is a man in love and she loves him back, so they have decided to be together as lovers -platonic so far- because they think they have no other opportunity to share their love. Im sorry If you feel that he is a rake, but I do not see it that way and I hope that many of you do not as well. Is that right? _Do you even like my Darcy?_ (Please answer!)

P.S Many of you keep asking how he will be able to break the engagement with Anne, but as I have already told you there is going to be a happy ending. So, please have a little faith on me and patience of course, I know it is hard, but please do.

**Spoiler:** _Someone is coming to Pemberley_. Who do you think it is?


	14. Someone is going to stay

**A/N: **Check out the previous chapter, because I do not thing you have read it. It is one of my favourites. Do not forget to tell me what you thought.

* * *

**Chapter fourteen: Someone is going to stay**

Breakfast was a pleasant affair, Georgiana most of the time engaged Elizabeth to conversation, ignoring Darcy completely. But in fact, he did not care at all. Seeing his sister enjoying herself with his love, was fullifiling. Afterall, there was too much time left, Elizabeth was about to go home soon and he did not know what the future hold for them. Even though he promised her that he will find a way, he was not sure if he could, but at least he was willing to try.

"Fitzwilliam, stop staring" Georgiana yelled "It is frightening!"

He laughed "I did not know that my look, could scare you." He paused "You never mentioned that before"

"It is not me, who is scared. It is Elizabeth"

Darcy immediately looked at her, only just to see her looking naively on her plate. "I am sorry, Miss Bennet"

And then, she turned her face and looked at him directly in the eyes, Darcy almost forgot to breathe "Tell me, have I done something to offend you?"

He shook his head negatively. Seeing her there, so close to him, but not able to touch her was a real torture to him. But, the most difficult thing was that they had to act indifferently,as civil acquaintances and not like they should act when they were near to each other, like lovers -platonic at least.

"Richard is coming today at last"

"Richard?" Elizabeth asked with curiosity.

"Our cousin, Colonel Fitzwilliam"

As Elizabeth heard the name Fitzwilliam, she immediately tought of Darcy and looked st him once more. "Yes, I have met him when I was in Rosings Park"

"He is the loveliest cousin that someone could have" Georgiana commented.

"His company is very pleasant, indeed" Elizabeth replied and touched her hand

"Pray excuse me. I will go for shooting, but I will be back before dinner" Darcy interrupted and bowed before he left.

* * *

It was after dinner, almost eight o clock when Colonel Fitzwilliam arrived in Pemberley and as he stepped in the drawing room, when the rest of the party was seated, he found Georgiana already hugging him. And after couple of minutes later, Darcy was next to him, welcoming him. As he sat on the couch, he asked to know about Elizabeth's health and insisted upon hearing her opinion about this part of the country.

"Has the war changed you?" Elizabeth asked Colonel and all the eyes were upon her.

"I suppose yes. When you see all those people dying in front of you and you cannot do anything to help them, just to stare at them blankly, wishing God to spare you that torture. Yes, then it is a lifetime experience. But if you ask me, I would honestly reply to you that if there was a way of not going back there, I would gladly seize it. It is only the reason I am looking for."

"Yes, I understand your reasons, but if brave men like you decide not to defend us, who else is going to do it?" They both laughed.

"I admire the way you compliment someone, it is like you never take time to think about them, like you truly believe the things you say. You mention them with the most unstudied way possible"

"But, I do believe everything I say but I am not yet aware if that is a virtue or a vice"

"It is a virtue to those you love and vice to those you dispise, I believe." He paused "I am thankful that I have done something proper to earn our appreciation."

She laughed. "You have done nothing, that is why I esteem you so much."

"What can you possibly mean?" he paused and looked Darcy, who kept staring at them "Women are so complicated creautures, dont you think Darce?"

He nodded. "...and manipulative, I dare say, when they want to"

Elizabeth gave him a severe look. "I protest." She paused. "We may be a lot of things, but manipulation is not on our character. The circumstances are those, which force us to act so" she looked at Darcy again "We want things to happen in our own way, but you cannot blame us. Who does not want that?"

Georgiana stood up and sat on the pianoforte, starting to play a new piece she was practicing for days now and Darcy was gravily silent, drinking his branch and staring from the opposite sit his cousin talking to Elizabeth. She looked at Darcy, just to see him looking intensively at her and without speaking, she stood up and remained close to Georgiana, turning the pages for her. The two men, approached each other and sat on the same couch, looking at the ladies. It took them couple of seconds to start talking.

"It is a pleasant surprise for me to find Miss Bennet here, is it not?" Colonel asked.

"Yes, I was surprised too. She came about a week ago, keeping Georgiana company, while I was away" he simply replied

"I see."

"How was your trip?"

"Boring." he paused. "Is Anne well?"

Darcy turned to look at him surprised, but then he remembered that his question was perfectly normal. He was engaged to her afterall, he should be aware of her condition. The truth was that he did not care at all, but that was unknown to everyone, including Richard, except from his sister and Elizabeth of course. Not to mention, Anne, who was well aware that he had not the slightest esteem towards her. "She is fine"

"Darcy, lucky man. I thought that you were not going to marry at all"

Darcy got pale. No, the only thing that he was not, was that. Luck was definitely not on his side. "Let us not talk of this." He paused trying to find another subject that they could discuss "Will you come with me for shooting tomorrow?"

Colonel just nodded, as Georgiana finished her performance and everyone gave her congratulations. Darcy begged her to play something more cheerful and she of course obeyed. But, just as Elizabeth left her side and moved towards the couch, she found Colonel Fitzwilliam in front of her.

"Seize this opportunity, Miss Bennet and join me for a reel"

She smiled. "I cannot believe that you have already found my wickness, Colonel. Dancing is one of the things I love the most."

Colonel smiled and gave her his arm, leading her into the middle of the room. As they danced, Darcy's eyes were upon Elizabeth the whole time. He was observing her elegant form, which was moving slowly, in a very tempting way. Her hands were touching his cousin's and the way she laughed, while they were dancing, made Darcy mad with desire. The desire to claim her as his, to touch her, lock her in a towel and never let her go. That kind of desire that made him unable to think, or breathe or move.

* * *

Thank you once more for your lovely reviews and I am very glad to know that I have your support. Thank you for the love you keep sending me. If the reviews continue raising tremendously, I will update the next chapter this afternoon. But, you should check the story out, because sometimes it does not go on the top of the achive. Do not forget to review. Love you all!

**Next chapter**: A misfortune


	15. A misfortune

**Chapter fifteen**: **A misfortune**

Darcy knocked Elizabeth's door and some minutes later, she welcomed him in. It was a quiet night that's why he took the chance of being near her again. He could see her astonishment, he was not expected. Immediately he sat down on the couch and Elizabeth without speaking, she sat opposite to him.

"I did not expect to see you." she said to broke the silence

"Why?"

"I pressumed that...ohh I do not know" she admitted.

"I am here because I got spoiled, as you so frankly said yesterday." he admitted, looking at her eyes. "I could not sleep alone."

"What do you mean?"

"Ohh do not play innocent to me, Elizabeth" he paused. "First, you get into my mind and then you claim my heart. Your lovely words keep ringing in my ears and your smell is everywhere." he admitted, taking some deep breaths "Do you think possible for me to sleep?"

She laughed, but as she saw his serious look, she realized that he believed and felt, everything he confessed. "But, that shall never occur again." his eyes met hers "I shall not sleep in you bed ever again"

"I do not mind sleeping here" he replied with a playfoul voice, teasing her.

"Do you wish to ruin me?"

"No, I am not" he said. "But, Elizabeth, I cannot sleep alone. Not, now that I got used to your sense. I will miss your breaths"

"My breaths?" She asked

"Yes, you take three deep breaths, before you fall asleep. Did you not know?" Darcy replied and Elizabeth froze. She stopped breathing. Did he really count the breaths she took last night? Does he love her so much and if that is the case, is it even possible to love someone so dearly?

After couple of seconds she asked "Do you think it is proper? Imagine if someone finds out"

"They are not" he immediately said and approached her and before realizing it, Elizabeth was in his arms. He rested his head on her neck and he took deep breaths, just to smell her perfume. He hugged her tight and leaned in to kiss her, but she moved away her head.

"Stop it!" She yelled. "Your cousin is sleeping in the next room, he will hear us"

"Richard is not a light sleeper"

"But, Fitzwilliam..." She tried to said but, as he heard his name, he claimed her lips. They shared a passionate kiss and when they stopped, they looked at each other.

"I love you"

She smiled. "Go to sleep!" She yelled and pushed him a little.

"I never imagined you to be so cruel." He said and gave her a smile.

"Do you really want me to be cruel? Because I can, and I dare say you are not going to like it, " she teased.

"No, I beg you." he paused and hugged her once more "But, I do have to admit that you look even more tempting when you are getting angry and cold."

"Is that so?" She asked with a severe voice and looked at him intensively.

"Yes, indeed"

"Fitzwilliam, you really have to go. You will get us exposed."

"I care not" he replied stubbornly, like he was a child.

"Go!" She yelled again.

"I want some time alone with you, but it seems that I cannot find any."

"We will find, but not now and definitely not in my chambers."

But, before Darcy could responce, there was a knock on the door, making both of them pale. If someome could hear their hearts, probably, he was not going to hear anything at all. They had stopped. There was a knock again.

"It is Colonel." a voice was heard.

But Elizabeth, nor Darcy moved a inch. They kept staring at each other until they heard a door close, finally allowing themselves to breathe. Elizabeth looked at Darcy, who was standing next to the window, looking outside. Elizabeth approached him and touched his arm, making him turn around to look at her. It was the first time in her life that saw such a thing. An expression of grief and anger was created in his face, something that she had never seen before, in anyone's face.

Darcy had so much to say that his mouth closed up tight struggling not to speak, so many thoughts churning inside him, that you he did not dare let them escape in case they blew him wide open. He was so angry that if he could see his look in the mirror, he would probably find a face of an evil, glaring back at him.

* * *

Do you like this turn of the story? Tell me what you think. Review please.


	16. It must have been love

**Chapter sixteen**: **It must have been love****  
**

_"It must have been love, _

_But it's over now, _

_It must have been good_

_But I lost it somehow_

_It must have been love_

_But it's over now_

_From the moment we touched_

_'Til the time had run out." - Roxette_

Elizabeth woke up with the same feelings she fell asleep with. Pain, misery, grief and lose. Yes, she felt a lose of something and more acurate, someone. Seeing Darcy looking at her in this way, she felt that she had lost him. He did not need to say a word, to confirm her, in fact he did not act at all. He just left. And that was frightening. She knew that they were not going to be together, but she did not want to feel anything bad about her. The truth was, that she did know what he must have felt or thought. All she knew, was that she had to talk to him.

She found him, one hour later, in the library, reading a book. She sat next to him, waiting for him to start speaking, but in vain he did not. He did not even look at her.

"Good Morning" she simply said

"Good morning to you" he replied with his serious voice, still not looking at her.

"I am pleased to find you here" she paused "I wanted to discuss about last night"

He took a deep breath "There is nothing to discuss"

"But I think to clearify the situation. I do not know what you believed..."

"I need to ask you something." She nodded. "Did you welcome his affections?"

"What?" She almost yelled. "I do not understand"

"I asked you a simple question, Elizabeth. Did you welcome his affections, yes or no?" He asked, almost yelling, but still keeping his look on the book. That was the only way, to calm himself. If he would look at her eyes, he knew that he was going to melt.

"No! Of course not"

"Then what did he want in the middle of the night?"

"I know not" she confessed.

Darcy finally turned his face, to look at her. "Do not act the innocent to me!" he screamed. "He knocked the door for a reason"

"I am telling you the truth Fitzwilliam. Do you think me such a wanton?"

"You said it yourself." Elizabeth froze. "I never thought that you could be that kind of woman. For God's sake, you saw him just yesterday." he said, desperately, angry And hateful in the same way. But, just as he heard his words, his heart stopped. No, he could not have said those things to her. No, he knew that she was not that kind of woman. He tried to speak again, take back all those things, but he could not.

Elizabeth looked at her lap, trying not to cry and at the same time, did not let her anger take over her. But that was not possible. "You should be ashamed of yourself!" She yelled "He never gave me any impression beyond friendship nor have I accepted anything"

"Is that so?" He yelled again, but Elizabeth stood up turning her back to him. He immediately grabbed her hand, making her look at him.

"You are hurting me!" She screamed, but Darcy kept pressing her arm. "You are hurting me!"

"I never believed that I trusted you." He paused

"You are being ridiculous" she said and touched his hand "Listen to me..."

"I am hearing..." he laughed ironically

"The truth is I do not know why he knocked the door, but I know that I am not what you are accusing me"

"You found him available and set to marry him for your security, just because I made that promise and I was not available." he paused "But, I told you that I will find a way, why did you not believe me?"

That was it. She slapped him, hard. Darcy got pale, except a part of his cheek, which was pink from the slap. She froze for one second, regretting what she did. Angry, and in love with him, tremendously ashamed, she turned away and left. Darcy stood there, watching her moving away.

* * *

Words can be said in bitterness and anger, and often there seems to be an element of truth in the nastiness. And words don't go away, they just echo around. And they kept repeating inside her head, bringing the same scene over and over again, until she could not breathe anymore, from the crying. She was hurt, angry and sad, not knowing if it was possible to feel all those feelings at the same time. How dare he, treat her in that way, speaking in that manner and of course, believing all those dreadful assumptions?

It would not matter anyway, it was over, for good. She should not have started it in the first place. No matter how much she was going to pain, trying not to love him, it would not worth it. It does not worth loving a man, who believes such dreadful things about you, seeing you as an abomination. It was going to be hard, impossible even, trying to forget him, stop loving him... The truth was that she could not stop loving him, the only thing she could do was to love him less than she did before. But, could she?

And then she heard a knock the door. She quickly strained her dress and wiped her eyes, trying to hide the redness.

"Why did you not changed? Did you forgot that today is the picnic?"

Ohh, no. "Georgiana, I have a terrible headache and..."

"But, Elizabeth you promised. Afterall, you are leaving in a few days and I want to spend time with you"

Elizabeth looked at Georgiana and tried not to cry in front of her, not show any emotion rather than sympathy and love, she felt for her. How could she be able to deny her such a simple thing? But, on the other hand, she was going to see Darcy again and she was not prepared to, not for now at least.

"Alright"

* * *

It was a lovely day, but to Elizabeth it made no difference at all. Even the sun was shinning bright upon them, even though there was a light breeze, she could not feel anything. She only felt numb, dazzling and hurt. She could feel the pain overwhelming her, she had not the strength to walk, or talk. She just wanted to lay on bed and sleep, forget eveyone and anything.

The two ladies walked down the lake, with Georgiana talking to Elizabeth. The truth was that she did not pay any attention to what she was saying, but she had to seem happy and excited for the picnic, which they both planned for days now. As they were getting closer, see could see both of the gentlemen standing, looking at them. Elizabeth's heart almost stopeed and she could feel her breath becoming heavier. She hated the man!

"Good morning, gentlemen" Georgiana said.

"Good morning to you" Richard replied. "Shall we sit?"

Elizabeth could not feel her legs, but nevertheless she sat down next to Geogiana, away from Darcy, but his sister, who had other plans, asked Elizabeth to switch places, because the sun was distarbing her. Elizabeth with heavy heart, accepted, and sat next to him.

"Will you not go to London today, brother?" his sister asked. Darcy just moved his head negatively, unable to speak.

"Are you alright, Miss Bennet?" Colonel asked. "You do not seem fine"

"Yes, I am thank you. I am just tired" she paused to think some excuse "I did not sleep well last night"

"i can imagine." he paused "I heard some noices coming from your room, I knocked your door to ask you if there was something wrong. But, I suppose you were asleep"

"Probably" she simply said and looked at Darcy, who was turned his face to meet her eyes. It was as simple as that.

"Elizabeth" Georgiana suddenly yelled, full of worry "What is that?"

Elizabeth looked her left arm, just to see a purple bruise. Darcy got paled. He had hurt her, that thing was his fault. She kept repeating that he was hurting her, but his anger did mot let him listen. He could not feel his legs and for sometime, he stopped breathing. How was it possible for him to hurt her, when he loved her so much?

"Ohh, it is an accident" she lied, lookimg down on her lap.

"It must hurt enormously" Georgiana confessed

"A little" she lied again.

But, just then, when Georgiana had occupied Richard, and Elizabeth was looking down, Darcy found the chance to grab her hand and give her something, a piece of paper. Eizabeth immediately looked at his eyes, which were red and black circles were created under them, she gave him back what he just handed her. That was it, enough!

* * *

If you have time, listen to the song by Roxette. This is the longest chapter, I have ever written, I believe, it not One of the best thought. But I had no time for confessions and descriptions of their feelings, because I had to build the plot. But, I will potray them in the next chapter. This fight and misfortune, would be the most important of all, because finally we are going to see if Darcy is willing to break the engagement or not. I hope that I did not disappoint you. Review please, it is important.

I wish you a happy easter. I have already written the next chapter, so I may upload it in the late afternoon, if your reviews keep rising! I want to make you understand that with reviewing you give me strength and power to continue, afterall I love hearing from you. Btw, I want to give my love to all of you, who keep reading and reviewing.

*** Important: **Tell me your favourite chapter!


	17. Here comes the sun

**Chapter seventeen: Here comes the sun**

_"Little darling, it's been a long cold lonely winter_

_Little darling, it feels like years since it's been here_

_Here comes the sun_

_Here comes the sun, and I say  
_

_It's alright" -The Beatles_

It was before afternoon, when Darcy knocked on her chamber's door with half heart. A heart that he had ruined himself, causing it to bleed, filled with pain and misery. But not only to himself, he had caused such despair, but to her as well. He had been so selfish, so bigheaded that he could not see beyond his own needs and wants. He was a human, and human make mistakes, but people like him should not act in that way. People, who are loved and that love consumes them, do not hurt their soulmate. Because, hurting them, is like hurting themselves as well. Holding on to anger, resentment and hurt only gives you tense muscles, a headache and a sore jaw from clenching your teeth. Forgiveness gives you back the laughter and the lightness in your life and that was what Darcy needed the most.

Elizabeth opened the door and he could see her surprise to find him there, but without saying anything at all he stepped in, looking the floor, ashamed. He coughed one time, trying to get rid of the embarrashment and weirdness. Elizabeth asked him to sit down. Her voice had not that usual high tone, but instead it was cold and indifferent.

"I want to...I need to" he blurred his words "I beg for forgiveness"

"For what?" She asked as though she did not know.

"For not believing you" he paused and looked at her eyes "for hurting you."

"I know you are" she sat down on the bed "But, I am still hurt."

He approached her, kneeled down and took her hands in his "I know and you have every right to be. But, Elizabeth you do not have any idea how much I love you, how I long for your touch and how much your love consumes me. I cannot breathe, every time you are not near me" he paused "I acted foolishly. But, I was not in my senses, you see, it pains me that I cannot make you mine."

"I love you so much" she said "but I cannot do this anymore. I cannot keep hiding, not able to say I love you when I feel the need to." She paused trying not to cry "I am terrible sorry and I would have never made you though this, but I cannot find another way"

"What are you saying Elizabeth? I do not inderstand"

"Me or her."

"Do you want me to decide between you?" he asked and she nodded "You know that I will always pick you."

She smiled "Yes, but are you willing to break your promise and ruin your reputation, just to be with me?" Darcy opened his mouth to speak, but he could not. He quickly stood up and made a few turns around the room, trying to think, but Elizabeth's voice interrupted his thoughts. "Is that so hard to decide?"

"No" he almost yelled and touched her hand "It is not, but I need time."

"Tell me" she demanded.

"I need time to decide, how and what should I do" he said and formed a smile upon his face.

"So you do not know.." She stopped the sentence, for she could not continue. He did not have the courage or the heart to do so.

"I will always love you. But...I made a promise and I will hurt Anne..I do not want to, she does not deserve it"

"Stop it." She yelled "Stop thinking about other's feelings and if you are going to hurt them. Think of what you want and what you need. Imagine your life in ten years from now and how you wish it would be." She paused "What do you see?"

It took him some seconds to answer. "You. I see you"

Elizabeth had not felt such a bliss before in her entire life, the kind of bliss, which leaves you breathless, unable to move or think. The bliss that should be felt at least once in every person's life, the bliss that gives you the guarantee that everything is going to be perfect.

She immediately put her hands around his neck and hugged him tight. "I love you"

"Evn though that I hurt you and I behaved like an coward pig?"

"Yes." She simply said and Darcy touched her faces and brought it closer to his. He gently touched her lips, for he needed that kiss.

"I think we should make a visit to Rosings" he said and she nodded.

"Do you believe that Lady Catherine is going to be very upset?" she asked and Darcy nodded. "I even now remember the way she spoke to him months ago"

"I am going to protect you, do you not believe me?"

"Should I?" She laughed.

"Yes" he replied with his severe voice.

"Ohh.. The master of Pemberley is displeased." she laughed "What should I get you sir, to calm your nerves?"

"You know what I need, madam" he replied indifferently. "The master of Pemberley wants your kiss"

"But, that is impossible. Imagine if someone gets in. You are in my chambers, have you forgotten?"

"Alright, I will leave, but do not be so cruel. Give me at least one kiss" Elizabeth approached him and gave him a quick, peck kiss, but Darcy pushed her from the waist to bring her closer to him "One more" Now, Darcy without resting any longer, he crashed his lips to hers and with all the love he had, kissed her pationately.

"Now go!" she said and pushed him. But, before he tried to open the door, Darcy stopped. It was Elizabeth's voice that made him stop "Do you think our love can take us away together?"

"I think can do anything we want it to"

* * *

After dinner, the party was seated on the drawing room and Georgiana as usual kept entertaining them with her music. Richard and Darcy were discussing about financial bussinesses and Elizabeth were gravely silent.

"What are you thinking Miss Bennet?" Colonel asked to get her attention.

"Nothing of importance." She lied "I was thinking my departure."

"Your departure?"

"Yes, indeed. I am leaving in two days"

"That is a pity, indeed. We will miss your company" he admitted and gave her one of his best smiles. But, before she could respond, Darcy interrupted them, with his cough. No, he was not jealous of his cousin and the attention he paid on Elizabeth. He should not he jealous, afterall. He knew she was his. It was not jealousy, he kept reminding himself, it was possessivenes. It was his and only his and she should not be talking to any man, except him. And that was the moment, when he realized how wicked, paranoid, complicated and passionate he could be, because of that woman.

* * *

I hope that I have not disappoint you with this chapter, you waited for. But, if I do, please tell me, so I can make it better. Tell me if you have any other ideas of what they should say to each other. Review please and tell me what do you think, maybe I will update the afternoon.


	18. A unexpected confession

**Chapter eighteen: An unexpected confession**

_"And i hope that i dont fall in love with you_

_Now the night does funny things inside a man_

_These old tom cat feelings you dont understand_

_I turn around a look at you you light a cigarette_

_I wish i had the guts to bum one but we've never met" -Marc Cohn_

For days, Georgiana tried to persuade Darcy to take her to London, because she wanted to buy some new pieces for the pianoforte and she was in need of new gowns. And that day, was finally when Darcy was convinced to take her to London. But, Elizabeth, who did not care to be moved away from comfort, she decided to stay at Pemberley and the Colonel stayed with her. They were seated in thr garden, reading poetry together and from time to time, when they stopped reading, they talked about the places the gentleman had visited or their interests.

Elizabeth had not enjoyed breakfast, the truth was that she had not eaten at all. She was very anxious and could not calm herself. After the Darcys return, this afternoon, they were expected in Rosings and the big announcement was about to happen. Se was afraid in a way, of what his aunt behavior would be and if Anne would be affected too much. But, she did not have to wait long, in a few hours she would know.

"Miss Elizabeth?" Colonel almost yelled. "Are you here?"

Elizabeth got alarmed, because her thoughts have driven her away from reality. "Yes, indeed. I am sorry. What you were saying?"

"I was just wondering when the wedding of your sister would occur"

"Less than a month" she paused to calculate the weeks "In about three weeks."

"Splendid. They were very lucky in love, finding one another"

"Yes, indeed. And if you imagine that they were people who tried to apart them"

"What do you mean?" He asked conserned.

"You still do not know.." she said in amazement. "Do not you remember what you had told me months ago? Mr. Darcy, who helped his friend getting out of the most unpleasant bond." she paused and looked down on her lap. "It was my sister.".

Col. Fitzwilliam froze and after couple of seconds, he touched her hand "I am sincerely sorry" he paused "I did not know."

"It is alright. Afterall, you were the one, who enlighten me and they helped them in a way of finding each other again."

He smiled a little. "Are you still bitter? I mean, are you still angry at Darcy?"

She paused to think a little. "No, I think I have overcome it."

"I see" he said and looked at her. "You know, there is something I've been meaning to ask you couple of days now, and the reason I am doing this now, it is because maybe I do not get the chance of doing it ever again. You are leaving tomorrow, and.." He paused to calm himself.

"Tell me" she said, trying to give him courage.

"When I arrived, you asked me about war and I replied to you that If I ever got the chance of quitting, I would happily do so. And I think the reason I've been searching is you."

Elizabeth froze. No, he could not possibly feel that way about her. "I do not understand"

Colonel took his hands in hers and approached her a little. "What I am trying to say and obviously I do not so efficiently is that I have come to feel for you a passion, an admiration and regard that I never thought that I could be able to feel." he paused to meet her eyes "I had feel the same things when I first met you, but they were weak and I was not so sure If they were strong enough, but I believe that all this time we spend together here, have made completely certain that those things survived and they are real."

"What are you trying to say?" she asked, frightened.

"I love you, Miss Elizabeth. And if you feel the same things about me, I will promise you that I will make my life purpose to accomplish every wish you might have. I will never go to battle field again and maybe I am not so wealthy as others are, but that does not mean I cannot make you happy." he took a deep breath. "Will you marry me?"

For a minute everything went black. She could not hear any longer the singing of the birds, nor his voice, she could not see his face, or the sunlight. Everything was blur. She closed her eyes for one second, trying to calm to her senses and when she did open them, the Colonel was still there, in front of her. Making her realize that this was not s bad dream at all. She took some deep breaths and trying to think what she was supposed to answer.

"I cannot" she finally replied. "I cannot marry you". Colonel took his hands away from her and he looked away, when Elizabeth touched his arm, making him look at her. "Because I cannot marry you, does not mean that I do not have strong feelings for you, you are a great man and if the circumstances were different, I would accept you. But they are not."

"Do you love someone else?" he asked in bitterness.

"Yes."

"So, I do not have any chance, do I?" he asked rhetoricaly, of course he had not.

* * *

Btw, take some time to listen to that amazing song, which makes me everytime shed a tear. What do you say about this? Do you like how things have turned out? Review and tell me your thoughts, I really do appreciate each one of it. Do you want me to continue, do you even keep reading my story?


	19. Walking on sunshine

**Chapter nineteen: Walking on sunshine**

_"I knew I loved you before I met you_

_I think I dreamed you into life_

_I knew I loved you before I met you_

_I have been waiting all my life" -Savage Garden_

_One day later, late afternoon, in the library of Pemberley..._

Have you ever felt what is like to feel home? The odd feeling when you stop believing for one second that you are all alone in the world, not defined by other people and of course owning your life. That was some of the sentiments the two lovers were feeling when they were seated there on the couch, embraced. They felt like they belonged together, linked in an unexpectable way, like the forces of the nature wanted them together for an eternity. They sat silent, trying to savoir every feeling they had felt at the moment, or ever felt the time they were together, they tried to listen to their own hearts beating in the same pace and just forget everything else, they just focused on each other and nothing more or less.

They had shared their news with Georgiana, that they were finally together and that they will be married soon and of course she could not be even happier. Indeed, Darcy had never seen her happier in his entire life and that meant in hers as well. She was a dreamer and as one, she was overwhelmed by the fact that all she believed in were true, that our deepest hopes, unspoken dreams and our desires can come true, when we fight for them. And Darcy had fought to win Elizabeth, he even could die with weapon at hand. Because, not only confronting Lady Cathrine was a fight, but also all the misfortunes they kept coming. Maybe, they were not all over yet, at least not the matter with Lady Cathrine, who was a stubborn woman and could not tolerate such an embarashment, but all the other affairs, had come to an end. At least, that was in what she believed in and hoped for, that this was their happy ending.

"Have you ever felt like this before?" Elizabeth asked him, breaking the silence between them.

Darcy kissed her hair and tight his embrace, when he finally answered "No, I have not and I dare say I never believed that I was able to understand such feelings, at least not until I met you" he paused. "You understand, I believe, that you have changed my world."

She laughed "Yes, indeed. Do you think that this was the way things should turn out?"

"I know not, but I believe that we make our destiny and build our own future. And I could not have build mine better." He smiled a little. "Maybe, we could not end up together, based on our previous unpleasant past, but I am glad we did."

"I have always believed, and I still believe, that whatever good or bad fortune may come our way we can always give it meaning and transform it into something of value." She paused to look into his eyes "And I am glad that we are together, that our love was cherished."

"Do you have overcome our misunderstandings?"

"Yes, I believe we have. We only need to look the future and wish that it has a safe journey for us."

"I had no illusions about you in my first proposal, you know," he said. "I knew you were headstrong and aggressive. But I loved you. I knew that your aims and ideals were not commonplace. But I loved you. I knew that you were the best choice I had. But I loved you. It's comic when I think how hard I tried to be amused by the things that amused you and how anxious I was to hide from you that I wasn't interested in you, even if you were not. I loved you so much, I didn't care. Most people, as far as I can see, when they're in love with someone and the love isn't returned feel that they have a grievance. They grow angry and bitter. I wasn't like that. I never expected you to love me, I didn't see any reason that you should. I never thought myself very lovable. I was thankful to be allowed to love you and I was enraptured when now and then I thought you were pleased with me or when I noticed in your eyes a gleam of good-humored affection. I tried not to bore you with my love; I knew I couldn't afford to do that and I was always on the lookout for the first sign that you were impatient with my affection. What most bachelors expect as a right, I was prepared to receive as a favor."

"I knew that" she paused "I knew that you were different from every man I had ever met, but I did not know if you were the best, maybe I was too blind to see the truth, or too proud to admit it. But, never, not once in this time, have I ever doubt your virtues, for they were proved to me and keep doing so, in every chance it is given. And I love you for it."

"Have I ever told you how much I love the sound of your voice ringing in my ears?" he paused "I could hear you all day"

She laughed ironically. "You have become such an expert in words, Mr. Darcy"

"I've always was, it was just that I never had the opportunity to express myself" he paused "at least before I started writing you the letters"

"Yes, indeed. It was only then when I realized how much you love me and in a way it helped me find my way to you." she paused "Promise me that we are not going to lose this magic, once we get married. Promise me that you will express your feelings in that beautifully way you did in your letters"

"I promise" he said and kissed her softly. He really had missed the taste of her lips, how his body shivered everytime he touched her and how complete he felt. She was every dream he ever wished life would be in the future, every desire he had of what his life contained.

"Will you love me forever?" She frowned

"Darling, do I have to keep telling you this? When are you going to believe me?"

"It is not that I do not believe you, I just want to hear it again"

"I love you and I will always do" he smiled a little.

"I leaving in the morning"

"Yes, I know. But, I am coming with you, I need to talk with your father."

They kept talking, until they had nothing more to say, but they continued, because he loved the sound of her voice mixing with his. He loved how their voices were tangled together, how their eyes were rolling, when they looked each other. He had missed her body touching his, how perfectly they were fitted together and how united they felt with every breath they took.

"I need to tell you something" she spoke agaiN "I do not want to keep anything secret from you."

"You are scaring me, darling, what is it?"

"Promise me first that you are not going to get angry" he nodded, giving her the permission to continue. "Colonel asked my hand yesterday"

Darcy froze, he got pale. She could clearly see a frown created as he heard her and she could feel his hands getting colder. "My cousin?" That was the only thing she heard him say, the only thing that he could say afterall for he felt the little green monster of envy rising upmto his head, he felt jealousy running through his veins. Yet he was a fool to fancy for a moment that she valued hisattachment more than his. If he love with all the powers of his puny being, he couldn't love as much in eighty years, as Darcy could in a day. And Elizabeth had a heart as deep as Darcy had; the sea could be as readily contained in that horse-trough, as her whole affection be monopolized by him. It was not in him what to be loved in Darcy.

She nodded. "Are you upset?"

Darcy took some really deep breaths. "Have you regret your choice?" His voice was bitter, hurt in a way. He suddenly stood up, leaving Elizabeth alone sitting on the couch, frozen.

"No, of course not" she replied and touched his arm as she stood up. "It is you, who I love"

"Do you?" he asked as though he did not believe her words. He wanted to hear her concerns and alleviate them, he wanted to hold her and kiss her and convince her that he would find a way to make their relationship work, no matter how hard that might be. He wanted to to make her hear his words: that he couldn't imagine a lofe without her,that his feelings for her were real. But most of all, he wanted to reassure himself that she felt the same way about him. She nodded and Darcy immediately put his hands in her waist, pushing her a little closer to him. "Do not leave me"

"I am not" she said confidently and look at him in the eyes, those dark blue eyes, whoch had captured her heart months now. She knew that he was not going to forget it easily, maybe not get over it ever, but she had to try. She knew him, from the moment she said such a thing, his behavior towards his cousin would change and not possitevely. Darcy could be very possessive, once he believed he owned something and especially the things he loved the most.

"I wrote you something, I meant to give it you tomorrow when I was going to leave alone, for I wanted to keep you company, but since you are coming with me, here it is" she said and gave him a piece of paper. Darcy took it in his hands, but immediately he gave it back to her.

"I want you to read it to me" he paused "now". They both sat on the couch again, embraced in the most improper way, but they did not care at all. They did not care about propriety any longer, it was something has had kept them apart for so long, it was a burdain that it had to be overcomed.

Elizabeth looked at him in the eyes for the last time and she started reading "Dearest, I feel certain that I am going mad again. I feel we can't go through another of those terrible times. And I shan't recover this time. I begin to hear voices, and I can't concentrate. So I am doing what seems the best thing to do. You have given me the greatest possible happiness. You have been in every way all that anyone could be. I don't think two people could have been happier 'til this terrible disease came. I can't fight any longer. I know that I am spoiling your life, that without me you could work. And you will I know. You see I can't even write this properly. I can't read. What I want to say is I owe all the happiness of my life to you. You have been entirely patient with me and incredibly good. I want to say that – everybody knows it. If anybody could have saved me it would have been you. Everything has gone from me but the certainty of your goodness. I can't go on spoiling your life any longer. I don't think two people could have been happier than we are going to be." *(by V. Woolf)

"I know what it is to live entirely for and with what I love best on earth. I hold myself supremely blest- blest beyond what language can express; because I am my love'a life as fully as she is mine" he said and smiled a little.

There could have been no two hearts so open, no tastes so similar, no feelings so in unison. Love possesses not nor would it be possessed; For love is sufficient unto love. And think not you can direct the course of love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course. Love has no other desire but to fulfil itself. But if you love and must needs have desires, let these be your desires: To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night. To know the pain of too much tenderness. To be wounded by your own understanding of love; And to bleed willingly and joyfully.

* * *

Btw, if you are wondering what happened with Anne you will find in the next chapter, which is going to be the last chapter of part one. So, keep patient and keep reading.

This is my best chapter, because I have done my best to portray their feelings, which are so divine. I almost cried upon reading what I wrote, I am so proud. Btw, the longest chapter I have ever written. I hope that you approve of this chapter, but still I want to tell me your opinion about it. Please, I need your opinion. Did you like it at all? If the reviews keep rising enormously I will update the night, for I do not want to keep you in suspense.


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